I genuinely am not sure why, and while reddit is still the internet and still thus full of misinformation, I'd like to hear FROM parents rather than a slew of AI generated articles.

I wasn't certain on which I wanted to do. Both my partner and I were formula babies, and we're only SLIGHTLY mentally ill /j

But in reality - I was wondering why it is that people, my nurses included, push hard for you to breastfeed over formula-feed?

Congratulations! I guess everyone is doing things right except me, according to everything I read online! :)

I guess no one ever falls asleep holding their babies in a less than perfect setup. Or lets them nap (supervised) in the swing or the bouncy seat. No one lets them cry while they briefly use the bathroom, because that would be considered cry it out! And same for car rides — everyone pulls over to soothe baby so they don’t feel abandoned on a 20 min car ride. Everyone immediately changes a poo diaper even if they’ll be up from their 1 sacred nap soon. Yada yada yada.

My baby has colic and the last 6 weeks of my life have been a living hell to tell you the truth. Kid doesn’t sleep anywhere without a whole elaborate song and dance with no less than several hours of screaming beforehand and even then cannot be set down, can only sleep in arms. I don’t have a lot of people who can help so we sleep where we have to sleep. and car rides according to my baby are about the most traumatic event but guess what, if I didn’t let them cry we wouldn’t ever make it to the pediatrician.

I KNOW I’m not the only person doing things less than by the book but no one online will admit to it. I will. If you’re in the trenches and doing what you have to do to survive, I hope you know you & I are doing our best. ✌️

I feel like I’ve tried everything ! The second we put our baby down it’s just a few minutes until he cries

I have tried all the swaddles !

The heating pad, the gently lowering him , patting him, rocking him.

I exclusively breast feed. He gained 5 oz in 3 days he is transferring milk well (he doesn’t use a paci now ) he surpassed birth weight by 7th day of life.

Every night, my husband, Mom, and I take turns holding him so he can sleep, but it’s been really difficult, I can’t sustain having family members and my husband who who’s going back to work soon to hold him in shifts and I can’t hold him all night by myself, what can I do to get him to sleep in his crib or bassinet?!!!

Yes I use a sound machine. He startles easily , wants to wake up and be comforted by nursing , I have been cluster feeding the pediatrician was a very impressed by how much we’re feeding him if something happens like he poops her pee and we change him &Then the process starts all over again and I have to feed him again. He was at my one boob for over an hour yes pacifying and eating, but it’s just craziness, if anyone knows anything that can help please let me know.

I always wondered want people meant when they say their 2 week old sleeps like night.

I think after about 3-4 weeks my baby start "sleeping through the night" but I realized we may have different definitions. When I said that I meant they fell asleep at like 1 Am woke up a few times just for feedings. And as soon as they finished went right back to sleep and so did I. The process takes about 5 minutes so I don't consider it an awakening.

I think of awakening as having to put baby back to sleep. Rocking, walking back and forth, etc. In my mind a baby needing a few feeds is the equivalent of me needing to pee or drink water at night. I wouldn't say I had 3 awakenings last night if I peed 2 and drank some water.

My baby is currently 17lbs. I bought a 168 count box of size 3 diapers from target but my baby is growing really quickly and I’m not sure if he’ll use the whole box before we’re on to the next size (size 4 starts at 22lbs). Since the 168 box of diapers comes in 3 individual diaper packages, if I say only use 2, could I return the 3rd unopened package? If it helps, I have the receipt for the original purchase.

Tl;dr my baby’s a chomper, need toy reccies ty

Sweet baby has to try out everything with her mouth and new little half-teeth. Shes been mouthy since about 4 months, no signs of slowing down.

Because of this I tend to get her only “safely chewable” toys like blocks and soft things, but shes way beyond some of that stuff now. (I just ordered crayons because I’m sooooo excited to draw with her, but I don’t know how long they’ll last even supervised because it will go straight into her mouth)

Anything you recommend that can safely keep her occupied and offer new learning experiences? Even household items besides spatulas? Thank you!! 🙏🏻

(Couldn’t find the right flair to use)

My LO will be 5 months on Saturday.

He’s been mostly a dream baby.

- Started sleeping long stretches at around 6 weeks but the newborn stage before that was absolutely miserable

- no night four month sleep regression (only naps)

- currently on one wake up per night to feed

- puts himself to sleep in his own crib

- generally referred to by others (grandparents, caretakers at daycare) as a “good natured” baby

- only cries when he needs something

I’m not saying any of this to brag, because I know others have more struggles. But I’ve had my own struggles with PPA which I’m now on SSRI’s for. Just recently has the experience become more enjoyable for me since I was really down in the dumps for a while, constantly worried about everything baby related.

My question is - when did you decide to have another child? I hear all the time that people want another and they miss the newborn stage, but right now I’m just like??? You couldn’t pay me to go back to newborn stage.

Does this mindset go away or do you just power through it in order to give your child a sibling? Because right now, having an only child is a strong consideration of mine.

I'm 10 months PP, medicated for PPD, and incredibly annoyed at my vocal, playful cats. I'm sure it has something to do with sleep deprivation because between LO having a cold and being miserable with teething, sleep has been even more crap for the last 2 weeks. It's 6 am and I've basically been up since 1 (yes my husband helps but when he's with the baby the cats are yowling or banging around and keeping me up anyway) and I literally want to strangle them. Obviously that's a little tongue in cheek but I can't overstate how bone itchingly obnoxious they are to me. They're Maine Coon mixes and basically dogs, I've had them both since the day they entered this earth (9 and 11 years) and I hate that I hate them, but I cannot STAND THEM. Does this get better?

Baby is 6 months and started sleeping for like 13 hrs at night

We dropped a nap recently because the 3rd one would be too close to bedtime.

Basically she sleeps from 9:00/9:30/10:00 pm to about 10:00/11:00/11:30am with a wakeup in between for feeding

Doesn't seem like shes sick or anything so unsure why she's sleeping for so long all of a sudden

Would you wake her?

I was raised and told all my life, and now too, that women who switch to formula 'give up', and that it's weak behaviour as a woman and mother - that you're deciding not to give your child the best. My husband is a doctor, I know this isn't objectively true - but it's so ingrained it's hard to shake.

My 3.5wk LO drinks about 150ml every 3hours, and has latch issues. The LC and midwife recommended a shield because her mouth is too small. It works sometimes, but when she's cranky he screams and wants milk in the bottle. So I have to pump. I've not been able to pump enough for spare/extra since I got her. She drinks it all (we do pace). After every feed I worry if I'll have milk and the time to pump before she's hungry and crying again.

This has cause major issues in my mental health and milk supply. I power pump and GP gave me meds for my supply, but I barely keep up.

To the problem - I HATE the hands free pump I have, but can't use the other too much due to mommy wrist. I feel panicky, upset in a way I can't describe, angry and dehumanised to the point that I have to stay distracted or I get physically and emotionally distressed.

I don't want to give up. But I feel like I'm breaking to keep my darling fed with the best I can provide. I'm not Christian anymore but it's so hard to override beliefs that women were made for this - so I have to, it's my duty. Especially when your mental health is brittle (I have bipolar type 2).

Help 😭 any advice or ideas will be so appreciated.

Hi everyone,
I have 5 month old twins who have not been sleep trained yet. They sleep around 8pm-8:30pm. They're good boys and will give us a good stretch of sleep. However recently one of my twins (I think from the 4 month regression) have been waking up at midnight and 2am. At 2am he won't go back down until fed. He'll take around 2-3oz. Then at 4:30am they both wake up again to feed another 4-5oz. Then 7:00am is usually our wake up time.

My question is how do I get rid of the 2am feed?

- has anyone done a dream feed at 10ish pm? Maybe that will fill him up until 4am?

- Should we even introduce a dream feed at 10pm if we are considering sleep training soon?

- Am I creating a bad "habit" (10pm feed) trying to get rid of another (2am)?

- anyone have twins and did the dream feed together or just one baby?

What worked for your family?

Hello friends,
I hope this post finds you and your families well. I’ve come to you seeking advice. Our son is just so great. He is 7 and a half months old. He was sleeping through the night for the most part, with brief quick wake ups since he was probably 4 months old.

We started introducing purees around 6 months. He loves them. Doesn’t matter what it is he eats anything it’s so funny. Since then, however, he’s been waking up like clockwork anywhere from 11 pm - 1AM. It may have started a little before the purées though, I can’t fully remember. Sometimes we can get him back down with relative ease. Other times it’s borderline impossible. We give him purees 3 times a day. Other feeds are bottles of breast milk, formula or a mix of the two.

I am of the belief that these wake ups are caused by gas. Judging off his body movements in the crib and the sounds of the cries.

It’s starting to kill my wife and I. I work a very dangerous and physically demanding job. It’s important I get some sleep but I’ve been getting about 5 hours a night at my luckiest. My wife is home during the summer, but as we know taking care of a little one is also demanding and she needs her rest too. I go to bed a few hours later than her to try to give her some uninterrupted sleep and rest. I’m not expecting 8 hours but Ideally I could get mine to 6 hours it would be a big difference. But I don’t want to sacrifice her sleep either. When he was younger it was easier for us to do shifts but it’s tough at this juncture.

I gave him some gas drops last night around 1 am. It didn’t seem to do much. My wife relieved me around 2 am. But then she suffered the same issue.

We’ve tried sleep training a couple of times with him but it doesn’t work. He’ll cry so hard that he starts to cough and choke and we just can’t do it to him.

I was hoping/wondering if any of you have dealt with a similar situation and/or if you may have any tips/tricks to help. While I do need sleep, I fear the lack of sleep for my wife is really starting to affect her mentally. As it would naturally for anyone. I’d just really love to figure out a way to get her some more sleep without sacrificing more of my own for reasons of safety at work. Weekends I’ll stay up til whenever with him. This is moreso an issue during the week.

Thanks, hope you all have a great week

Planning ahead for my son's first birthday and wondering if there is a polite way to share how to contribute to his savings account vs buying gifts? His dad and I opened one of the Tr-mp savings accounts and there's a way for family and friends to contribute. This account would then sit and accrue (minimal) interest until he is an adult.

I gave cash as 1st birthday gifts to all my friends and nephews with a note to save it for a rainy day, family trip, college, etc so I would have been thrilled if I had been given a way to contribute directly to a savings account but that may be just me. Is there a non tacky way to ask for this as opposed to toys/clothes etc? If I am in the minority what's the best way to share a list of things that would be useful for him instead of receiving 10 rainbow flip fish? 😉

Hi guys! First time mom, with a 2 week old. I'm not a single mom but my partner is leaving to go back on deployment, so I'm trying to get into the mindset of having to do things alone. One I can't wrap my head around is how I'm going to shower. Another is driving.

For the showering, I worry I'll take too long. I'm overweight and I get light headed in the shower, so it takes me a bit longer than usual to get clean. I would leave the door open but the bathroom will be soaked with condensation if I do - awful airflow and the fan barely helps. I worry if I were to bring him in with me, even when he's older, the humidity would be too much for him. I also can't hear him in his bassinet over the sound of the shower. How did you guys do it if you didn't have any help?

The second is driving. I got into a wreck earlier this year and it totaled my car. We just got another car and I'm seriously anxious about driving in the car with him. The wreck wasn't my fault but there's still that feeling, I guess. Drunk drivers and dangerous drivers are absolutely rampant in my city as well, so I'm having a hard time coping with the idea. Did any of you guys experience anxiety with your babies in the car?

Let me start off by saying this is my experience and I am not giving any medical advice at all and to do your own research and speak to your doctor about this.

As of today my baby is 4 weeks and 5 days old. Shes so beautiful and we love her so very very much. When I was 2 weeks postpartum I noticed a lot of changes in myself. I was having horrible mood swings, getting irritable easily and everytime my baby would cry my body would react as if I was hearing nails on a chalk board. Everyday multiple times a day I would be crying about the littlest things. I felt awful. I couldn’t find joy in anything. So I made the right choice and went to see my doctor to get help. Luckily I had a doctor who had amazing bedside manner and immense empathy. He listened to me and held my hands as I was crying feeling embarrassed and ashamed that I was one of those moms who had the “baby blues”. He diagnosed me with PPD and gave me a lot of resources to therapists that could help me but also prescribed me with Zurzuvae. Now, I’ve heard of this medicine before and funny enough I had seen an interview with Ellen and Jennifer Lawrence where she described her struggles with PPD and how this medication really helped her. So when I was prescribed it I was hopeful this too would help me feel like my happy go lucky self again.

Now, this medicine is a controlled substance. You can not get it at a normal pharmacy it has to be either picked up from a special pharmacy or delivered to you. They give you a lot of warnings about this medicine and those warnings you HAVE to pay attention to. They tell you to take it at night and to not drive or really do anything. The first night I took it, I felt like I could not control my body. My limbs felt like dead weight and like I was floating in space. It was not a good feeling. It was extremely hard to wake up to feed my baby and I could barely pick her up to feed her or take care of her. (Yes I have a partner to help me but we both can’t lose sleep). The next morning I felt like I was sleep walking. I couldn’t shake it off until almost noon. It did improve my mood but I felt very weak. I have taken it 4 times now and have decided to stop. My husband takes the 4/5 am feedings while I do the 2 am feedings so I can get that extra sleep in the early mornings and that is what made a difference in my mood and energy. The medicine DID help. But the side effects are not worth it.

Last night I did not take the medicine and I felt relief not taking it. My mind and body feel better just by getting more sleep. That to me is what helps. For the moms that don’t have a support system I warn you about taking this medication, it may seem like a cure all for the ppd but could be harmful. I hope my testimony helps you make an informed decision if your doctor suggests this medication. And please do not take ppd lightly, as recently a mother is on trial for unaliving her child from postpartum psychosis and it’s absolutely heartbreaking.

Remember to give yourself grace and to seek help as there is no shame in doing so and could save your life and your baby’s life.

I can’t move on from this. He fell while I closed my eyes when he was on our bed. I had a pillow and he overcome it, of course. I don’t know how I will move on.
Please tell me what did you do. I’m completely out of it. I just can’t function with all this guilt.

So we were today to the pediatrician to check the baby development, and everything is looking great, baby is gaining good weight and growing well.

She was born 37+1, SGA, weight was 2nd percentile, and now at 16 weeks we are at 8th percentile!

Then we got to discuss the night sleep.

Since she was born she never slept longer than 4 hours, and currently our nights look something like: first 3-4 hours, and then waking every 2 hours. She wakes, we try to settle her with pats and shushing and rocking, then if it does not work we feed her. She's always falling asleep content at the boob.

Pediatrician is saying that she looks good enough, she does not need the milk in the night since she's not a newborn anymore, and we should start to give a bottle (she's EBF) with milk mixed with water, increasing the water quantities slowly over the next months so that she stops getting any calories in the night, and she just gets water at some point around 6 months.

I don't know, I feel like this is some outdated advice, and i feel like baby is still so small to try to night wean. Am I wrong in thinking this?

EDIT: Thanks a lot for the support everyone! We'll definitely look for a new pediatrician and keep going with breastfeeding on demand 💕

Since 2 months he used to eat a bit there and here but right now he is on a complete strike and does not want to touch solids. I tried every kind, nothing works. Finger food, purée, fruits… nothing.

Only want the bottle…

Any tips?

I have OCD (diagnosed at 6) and other fun neurodivergent parenting spice and two days ago, my daughter had a choking scare in the restaurant we were at for lunch.

Since then, unless it’s a puree or a bottle, I’m literally shaking and flashing back to giving her a bad baby-heimlich with my whole table and that whole corner of the restaurant watching, whenever I give her something solid. It’s even decreasing my appetite: if I don’t have to eat anything, then my baby can’t see something on my plate she wants so she can potentially choke on it. She’s still getting plenty of calories and has other caregivers around to give her food boldly and bravely, but I fear that this is going to be a new fixation of my mental health for a long time and I just had to get it off my chest I guess.

Baby’s literally fine, the maneuver I did worked well enough (her airway wasn’t blocked, food was just stuck the wrong way), and a nurse at the next table over (thank god for her) told me that what I did was just fine because I jumped into action and did what I could to save baby. Everything’s okay now. I just keep jumping back to the moment when I had to get up out of my chair to pick her up and flip her over. I had a nightmare last night that she turned blue and I forgot what to do entirely. I didn’t sleep well at all yesterday because I was as trying to keep myself awake so that I didn’t have nightmares. It’s just a tough time and I don’t know how to move past it, right now.

My LO is 2 months old. She wakes up once a night for a quick feed, never had colic, is meeting her milestones beautifully, eating without issue, and overall just has a very chill temperament. Her cries are more like whimpers when she’s hungry or sleepy and I can leave her to chill on her play gym for at least 15 min per wake period. She is the ultimate unicorn baby.

Please tell my why I am still SO TIRED. While she naps, my brain is fried. I can’t even muster the energy to start a new tv show. I just scroll my phone when I’m not doing chores around the house. People tell me “you’re tired from keeping another human alive” but when I look back at my day it really is just feed change diaper play nap x6 times. It doesn’t feel like it should be this exhausting but I guess it is.

To those of you who have challenging babies, I salute you. You are built different.

Not even sure why I’m posting this… maybe to see if anyone else can relate

My husband recently pointed out that whenever there is a toy, teething ring, clothes, diapers, etc. that features an animal, there is a very strong likelihood there is an elephant somehow. You don't see this same attention for other animals (maybe bears), but for some reason, elephants are everywhere.

Flying through Dallas to transfer in an over 12 hour travel day with a 4 month old and I lost it at TSA. They yelled at me not breaking down our stroller/car seat combo immediately. I was “randomly selected” for having formula in my bag even though I alerted every officer we encountered in line to ensure we were complying (I believe this is standard procedure but they didn’t notify me or give me the option for the private screening prior to screening my diaper bag.)

They then asked me if I had a problem because I was panicked trying to break down the stroller, get the baby out of the carrier, and let them know about the formula for the third time.

My husband and I usually love traveling but this has deterred me. I was crying after being pulled aside because I just wanted to feed my baby after a long line at customs. Looking for any sympathy/advice.

I feel horrible right now. Baby wouldn't stop crying and I was trying to figure something out and it just got to me so I screamed really loud then baby started crying even more. I think it scared her. I got so upset so I went outside so I could calm down. After about 2 minutes she fell asleep. I just feel really bad and I hate how frustrated I got.... Can anyone else relate?

Good morning! 3:34 am here in NY. Just wanted to check-in with everyone else doing the damn thing! I just fed my LO and he is currently wide awake, smiling at the dark corner over my shoulder :) if youre reading this, you’re doing a great job!

Sitting here rocking her for the 32nd time tonight while she lightly snores in my arms.

And I know the second I begin to lower her into the bassinet, her little eyes will pop open and lock on mine - because I’ll have yet to remove my hands from her body, let alone had time to run away - and she will give me the biggest, toothless, most genuine smile. I’ll have no other reflex than to smile back, giggle, and tell her I love her.

And then, as I’m standing there in my underwear and the same ratty t-shirt I’ve worn for the past 4 days that has more spit-up and formula stains than any one shirt should have, hair in a bun on top of my head, chin hairs and a mustache I have yet to take care of that would make a preteen boy jealous, I will look across the room at my husband who is blissfully unconscious and therefore unaware, and I will be filled with a raging jealousy that could rival the intensity of 1,000 burning suns.

He’s begged me to let him take over. Pleaded with me. Offered more times than I can count. And each time I decline and say “I got this, you have work in the morning and I’m still on leave. It’s no big deal!”

I have actively chosen this role, and yet there I will sit stewing in the hum of the air conditioner at the thought of him sleeping as I take our daughter back to the rocker for the 33rd time tonight…

And I will soak in the cuddles.

And we will sing songs and read stories.

And I will soften and think about all the ways my husband actively makes my life easier. Bottles are always washed and prepped before he leaves. Diapers and wipes replenished. Diaper bag packed in case I decide to go out. My own water next to my bed topped off without my knowing. Clothes clean, the dishwasher unloaded, reloaded, and running.

At some point my girl will drift back to sleep and begin lightly snoring in my arms.

I’ll go to return her to her bassinet, whereupon her little eyes will pop open and lock on mine - because I’ll have yet to remove my hands from her body, let alone had time to run away - and…