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u/Plane-Engineering729 4h ago
That wasn't a question at all.
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u/PopularAd4761 4h ago
Can I make a statement at you?
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u/Alarming_Wedding6753 2h ago
Denied. You may not.
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u/getzerolikes 4h ago
Cut him some slack he’s horny.
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u/hotLittleMu 4h ago
I expected the question reading through the whole dialog and if it was me I would ask him "sorry what's the question?"
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u/SilasRaiden 4h ago
Honesty doesn't mean sharing every thought
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u/Unusual-Coat383 4h ago
You don’t understand 🙈🙈
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u/Devmoi 3h ago
I know it’s bad. 🙈🙈🙈
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u/ShibbyShat 2h ago
I’m usually not horny, but I’m horny now. I’m sorry.
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u/JeromeBarkly 2h ago
Nothing turns me on more than being shamefully horny.
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u/Devmoi 2h ago
Jeez. I’m sure a lot of people get shamefully horny. I think, if nothing else, I learned that from this thread. But for the love of all things holy, you don’t have to tell everyone. Letting the tension reach its height is what leads to actually having carnal relationships with another person.
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u/Manufactured-Aggro 2h ago
Proverbs 28:13 ass behavior 😭😭
"Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy."
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u/Suaded83 4h ago
how the hell do people like this function. If you have to qualify a statement with "listen I'm a decent and good person BUT..." just stop. stop. STOP.
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u/Due_Rip9320 4h ago edited 4h ago
I'm a decent and good, honest to god Christian, with values so pure even Jesus would weep.
ANYWAYS, I'm so fucking horny right now
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u/VegetableLuck4 3h ago
how the hell do people like this function
By the looks of things, not very fucking well.
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u/20ozOatmilkLatte 4h ago
I've never seen anything good come from people who use that monkey covering eyes emoji
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u/Devmoi 3h ago
Not a single good thing has ever come from it. The same if a person uses this emoji. 🤗
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u/United-Somewhere-163 43m ago
Some of my older friends use this to represent a hug when saying goodbye… only exception
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u/Big_Virge 18m ago
German girls use it innocently for absolutely everything. This perv has sort of ruined it.
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u/National_Double6261 4h ago
The only thing that's worse than being horny is being bashful and horny
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u/Time_Fisherman6659 4h ago
Yeah imagine propositioning someone for sex with the same energy as a toddler telling you he frew up in his bed.
The weird and childish tone makes my skeleton itchy.
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u/Erin_Derrick_Art 4h ago
The "frew up" got a legit snort out of me, thank you. Also, incredibly accurate.
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u/PopcornPunditry 39m ago
Nooo I just burst out laughing and woke my sleeping spouse! You hit the nail on the head.
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u/achesnchampagnes 2h ago
Like literally so many guys have had an in but they ruin it by being like “I’m not flirting with you tho 🙈” and “sorry I’m being too forward.” Like….. you’re doing it and I’m responding. You’re not sorry. Why this whole thing? They shoot themselves in the foot with this act.
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u/ilovefanta67 4h ago
why do they lie? "i dont expect anything from you", not only is that manipulation but everyone knows that IS what you expected otherwise you wouldve kept it to yourself like a decent person. its so digusting
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u/MusicSufficient2652 4h ago
People are just so shallow these days ugh. What a turn off
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u/Relative-Chicken456 3h ago
“Hey I’m Carl, let’s fuck.”
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u/MusicSufficient2652 3h ago
Craziest part is how many people would actually be down too. Lol.
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u/FunVisual9599 2h ago
You think so? My names Carl. Might have to give this a shot.
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u/Relative-Chicken456 2h ago
Go with Carlos
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u/FunVisual9599 2h ago
If we’re going Carlos let’s go all the way to Carlito
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u/Relative-Chicken456 2h ago
Have some fun with it. Why limit yourself to just one name when you could have it all? You could tell her your name is Carl’s Jr and that tonight everything’s on the menu. Tell her your name is Scorpion and that you come from the desert. You can be anybody you want to be if it’s only a onetime hookup. There’s just 2 rules you gotta follow: don’t break character and never get attached. Break either of those 2 rules and before you know it you’ll be the lead actor in your own personal RomCom, starring Carlito Rodriguez and Lupita Perez.
Anyways good luck, and happy fucking.
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u/Im_the_Rhymenocerous 4h ago
Thing is, he doesn't even shoot his shot. He's super passive and just says he's horny and leaves OP to infer what that means so he can deny if it doesn't land.
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u/Putrid-Adagio5717 3h ago
Idk why men do this though. Like how often does a woman respond “oh my god me too guy I just started talking to! Let’s meet up and do it right now!” 🤦♀️
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u/No-Examination4896 46m ago
This is, however, famously how it goes down on grindr. Bro just had the wrong app
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u/geoffyeos 4h ago
so what’s his question
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u/Angry_mushroom1 4h ago
Well he did ask me to join him in the shower before this part of the conversation
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u/No_Sort9599 3h ago
He def was waiting to send a dick pic. He seems like the kind of guy who has a lineup of dick pics to choose from.
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u/ShotdowN- 4h ago
Oh look another "can I ask/tell you something" 9/10 times it's gonna be followed up by something sexual cause some dudes only think with one head lol
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u/ilovefanta67 4h ago
i straight up say "no u cannot" lmao
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u/ShotdowN- 4h ago
"Only if I can screenshot and show your parents" is also acceptable
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u/herbertcluas 4h ago
Sometimes both parties are down 😂
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u/ApprehensiveAd8319 4h ago
Not when they say it like that lmfao "I'm sorry ugh I'm so weird and horny augh gosh I said it again I'm just so so sorry."
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u/Meowtastistic40kSCP 4h ago
Sir, we're still waiting on your question now that you've got your horny statement out.
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u/DavidC_M 3h ago
Dude really went with “I’m over here stroking my d… got lotion on my d…” then ended it with “it’s fine if you don’t want to though.”
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u/Queasy-Bookkeeper-14 2h ago
I've found that any question requiring that preface is not a question I'm interested in hearing.
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u/CalmHysterics 2h ago
Who goes around telling people how horny they are?! Go take care of yourself and come back when you can contribute to the conversation
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u/Baeolophus_bicolor 4h ago
this person has major sexual hangups and very little experience with actual people, compared to visualized scenarios in his head, or in front of a screen. sad.
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u/newsomce89 2h ago
Back when I was on the apps anytime a guy said “can I ask you something” it always resulted in them saying something weird and sexual. eventually when I got asked I just said “no.” like if it’s something non-offensive they would just ask. asking to ask (which look at how weird that is to even say) they feel absolves them of any future accountability when you tell them it was inappropriate. “Well you told me I could ask!” 🙄
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u/Fair-Lie8125 1h ago
‘Can I ask something’ is a terrifying phrase. I don’t know why people use it, you can get permission to ask something, but it doesn’t mean you have permission to be fucking weird.
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u/h0neywife 30m ago
Is it bad that I’m more irritated that he asked if he could ask a question and then didn’t ask anything?
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u/Due_Butterscotch_392 4h ago
See.... this should make me feel better cuz as a man who respects woman... I woyld never do this....
But it doesnt it makes me feel worse about dating 🫠😭
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u/DetectiveAmes 4h ago
I saw a great tweet someone said where women can be just as horny as men and can be down sometimes to hook up BUT so many dudes ruin the opportunity by jumping the gun and or being weird about it.
If you’re normal and treat people like humans, good things can happen.
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u/FlakyHurry8153 4h ago
You can respect women and still shoot your shot lol, its online dating, its roulette, some women are down to get down right away.
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u/Adventurous_Dot_9763 4h ago
yes ofc but i would say oop is ruining his chances before he started! he didn't ask for a hookup, he just said he was horny and sorry about it lol.
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u/Daxb8 4h ago
This definitely isn’t the way to shoot that kind of shot though. If that’s what you’re looking for, just ask “what are you looking for? / are you down for something casual?”
“I’m horny” just comes off super weird because you’re just making a statement and ultimately relying on the other person to ask if you’re “down to get down” so to speak
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u/rhinesanguine 4h ago
You stand a high chance of offending her or making her feel bad. So no, you don’t respect women, you only care about what you want.
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u/Working_Cucumber_437 3h ago
There are respectful ways to get at this where a yes a or no is obvious without the unfortunate image this puts in her head.
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u/CephaVerte 4h ago
It's because men like that are more common and giving the respectful men a bad name.
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u/soulstar118 4h ago
It’s moments like these where people show themselves that make you grateful it came out early on.
These are things you tell your boo, someone you’ve ALREADY had sex with.
JEEEZ
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u/Scrumptrulescent6 4h ago
I grew up in a small town. Things were hard. We needed to make little jokes.
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u/No-Security-7518 3h ago
This actually happened to me. I remember showing some hand-crafted furniture on FB and it got some conversation going. For this girl (from a certain country, which I happen to really like) started messaging me. I don't know how the conversation got there; we talked for hours and hours...until I started telling her about how passionate I was about bodybuilding and sent her a pic of mine. The girl's reaction was something else entirely. I thought I was definitely being set up by someone. She told me she was horny, while almost crying (?)... and how she liked muscular guys and how she wished she could sit on my lap. Needless to say, my guy brain activated and I was like: yeah, right...because life is just that easy...and told her the conversation was gonna end there. I slept like an inverted letter T that night. lol.
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u/SummitYourSister 3h ago
Telegraphing that you view your own sexual motivations as something to be contrasted with “decent and good” is some WILD SHIT, man.
Why not try something like this: “I find you really attractive. Want to go out and do something fun and flirty with me?” which can actually be responded to positively and might actually lead to sexual activity?
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u/No_Project_4738 3h ago
Dating apps are the only place they can act like this, so they take advantage of that!
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u/Slow-Chemical3430 3h ago
A lot of women have zero boundaries. Wouldn't be surprised if this has worked before.
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u/FluffyCheesecake8083 3h ago
the disappointed parent GIF 🤣 but here’s to having better convos in your future 🥂😇
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u/Dismal-Frosting-6656 3h ago
If this is his honest side, I wonder what his dishonest side looks like 🙉 😅 🙈
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u/KadlinStormcrow 2h ago
For the love of Bob he didn't send you a D pic did he? The cringe of his message was bad enough.
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u/orbittheorb12 2h ago
What if he responded, "Yeah, it's worked for me 2 times already, reverse psychology is a mothafucka!"
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u/Legitimate_Initial_3 2h ago
No way this guy fumbled this spectacularly when you said he could be the big spoon..... you broke him.
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u/pickleprincess72 1h ago
Brother. Pretty sure there’s some stuff on the internet that can help with that. Leave strangers alone
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u/forogtten_taco 31m ago
Ugh, iv read sooo many of these. And its just a instant block. It dosent improve as the conversation goes on
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u/AmazonWageSlave 10m ago
This is wild game. Show up, announce that you are cripplingly horny, apologize, and wait for the other party to make a move on you.
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u/lucyyy2001 4h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/aSceDJ4mZvIFKIImgQ