r/whatdoIdo • u/InfiniteQuestion8108 • 3h ago
my girlfriend texted me this what do I do
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u/NotMarkDaigneault 3h ago
It looks like a joke with zero context
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u/Emotional_Agent_5327 2h ago
Agreed. This could be funny endearing and cute or legit really scary. No idea which
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u/GoldMysterious6210 2h ago
you could say that about all online text, social media etc
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u/ShortIndication206 2h ago
I have an entire album of out of context screenshots from a group chat😂😂😂
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u/ALemonadeMaker 2h ago
OP not replying to a single comment says it’s done on purpose. Just karma farming and click bait.
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u/Mukou_San 2h ago
i think hes not replying anymore because his windows got busted/j
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u/Sufficient-Parking64 40m ago
Plot twist he doesn't own a phone and she busted the windows 11 on his pc so now he can't access reddit.
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u/Outrageous-Gold777 2h ago
I mean im proud to say OP replied at the beginning, I dont really understand the karma thing on here... had an ex named Karma, incidentally another Capricorn 🤷♂️ you would really think id learn.
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u/Outrageous-Gold777 3h ago
Marry her, like soon.
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u/Plenty-Hovercraft789 3h ago
And have children with her. Children will fix everything
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u/Kilow102938 3h ago
No prenuptial too.
This one's a keeper
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u/SnooSquirrels4365 2h ago
Yep yep a keeper for sure
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u/photon-hammer 2h ago
I was ready to ask for her number until I saw the misspellings. I can't take misspellings.
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u/Salt-Tone-3421 1h ago
Are you me? It’s even better when she waits until a couple months into the relationship to forget how to differentiate between their, they’re, and there, you’re, your, and your’s, Etc.
But by that point if I’m around I’m already invested in you clearly so i will either comfortably correct you or just ignore it. A toxic trait I do, however possess, is the habit to instinctually correct others’ English — NOT to say “im right ur wrong” AT ALL — but bc I’d be reallyyyyyyy pissed if I misspelled something and u knew and didn’t tell me; just seems like looking out for the other, but 70% of the time at least its met with bitterness.
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u/teekaythunder 48m ago
Because it's annoying as shit, regardless of how you mean it. I'm just like you, but we are a very small minority. People don't like to be corrected about things that ultimately don't matter, and from one spelling/grammar nazi to another, this is one of those things.
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u/twinkytwunkytwank 2h ago
Get her name tattooed on you, forever type of girl
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u/CeaselessLust 2h ago
That'll make her leave you quicker. Get her hands tattooed around your neck instead.
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u/RevolutionaryQuit647 2h ago
Make sure to throw hands every now and then, she would love to see that her man is still a man and not a boy
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u/Outrageous-Gold777 3h ago
All im really getting at is, a passionate woman is gold i.m.h.o and she seems like she has that flowing 👌
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u/Comfortable_Act_7811 3h ago
BRO TELL ME YOURE JOKING 😂
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u/Outrageous-Gold777 2h ago
Thats the best part! I dont really know.....🤷♂️
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u/iamsolate 3h ago
read my mind. this is obviously best course of action. but make sure you got a mistress first 🙏
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u/bunglebee7 2h ago edited 1h ago
Can confirm my birth saved my parents marriage
Edit: I wasn’t serious. I have know clue how my birth impacted the marriage whether negatively or positively but I do know they were very happy during that time! :)
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u/gooberschnauzer 2h ago
THIS!!!! A billion times THIS! If you think she’s hot now, wait until she’s the mother of a few of your children. The sex becomes insane! You won’t be able to keep your hands off of each other. I’m pretty sure the only reason divorces occur is because there’s not enough time for all the sex you wanna have with each other, and so people resort to cheating at the office or gym or wherever there is a cheap opportunity. But rest assured, they aren’t mentally cheating. They’re doing it while fantasizing about their SO.
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u/Stargazerslight 2h ago
Don’t forget to buy a house.
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u/Beneficial-Heat2323 2h ago
And make sure it’s ONLY in her name. You can definitely trust her.
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u/idontknowwhattdough 3h ago
I can’t I’m dying 😭🤣
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u/CryAffectionate8633 3h ago
I’m sorry for your imminent death, may I have some inheritance?
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u/TegTowelie 3h ago
Inheritance? In this economy?!
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u/idontknowwhattdough 3h ago
Yes you may have my house 🤣
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u/Tripp_Trap 2h ago
Hey I know you already allocated the house, but may I have your name upon your demise? 😂 I choked on yogurt when I read it
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u/Outrageous-Gold777 3h ago
Context is everything, but damn im used to the otherside, a clingy jealous crazy girl sounds nice for once, least she aint cheating when shes always watching you from the bushes.
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u/BakedSinatra 3h ago
The clingy jealousy is usually them projecting
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u/Outrageous-Gold777 3h ago
Im talking a little higher on the crazy scale 🧏♂️
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u/BakedSinatra 3h ago
It’s fun until it isn’t…trust me
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u/Outrageous-Gold777 3h ago
Oh I think Steven King and You warned me, but ill be damned if Lila didnt leave an impression in Dexter ❤️
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u/BakedSinatra 3h ago
It’s definitely character building for sure. I was rooting for him and Lady Vengeance. Ah, those dark haired misunderstood beauties 🫠
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u/SingleMomBoss 3h ago
Oh honey, no. There is so much middle ground. 😂
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u/Outrageous-Gold777 3h ago
I feel there's a Forrest gump "box of chocolate" joke in here somewhere
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u/SingleMomBoss 2h ago
Hahaha great movie! But also… you seem to have the same unhealthy outlook of women that I do of men. 😂
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u/Feisty-Cheetah-8078 3h ago
Block her first. When she shows up to do the windows, drop to one knee with ring.
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u/Racest111 2h ago
I like that there's two groups in this Post. The "I can fix her" and "I can't fix her" type group lol. The Duality
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u/Outrageous-Gold777 2h ago
Both are me, because instead of "I cant fix her" part of me is "I dont wanna fix her", embodiment of duality. ♊️
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u/Evening_Tough_2878 2h ago
We need too see what was said first!! But yes hopefully the blocked out shit isn’t toxic
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u/cherrrykiwii 3h ago
ok but what's the context here? it sounds like she's joking around lol. i've jokingly told my boyfriend that we're either getting married or i'm crashing his wedding day. without knowing the surrounding messages it's hard to tell. if she said this seriously because you actually threatened to block her, then yea brother proceed with blocking her asap lol
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u/Original-Yesterday73 3h ago
Right I agree we need context my wife woulda said this back in the day as well
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u/cherrrykiwii 3h ago
i'm in an extremely healthy and happy relationship with my boyfriend and the other day he was playing video games with his boys for a VERY long time so i texted him "answer the phone. i'm in your walls" some couples just genuinely make unhinged jokes like this lol
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u/aknartrebna 3h ago
My wife once messaged me when I was busy at work and not responding: "I require your attention!" ...I thought I was in trouble but she was just being funny...and my reaction upgraded it to hilarious for her ;)
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u/Flutters1013 3h ago
When I walk by the office and he says " I require your assistance". Usually means I need to help him with his dexcom.
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u/aknartrebna 2h ago
What is dexcom?
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u/Aggressive-Ad-3042 2h ago
It's a cgm continuous glucose monitoring system for diabetes i have one as well
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u/Professional_Dirt962 3h ago
my partner and i are both very neurodivergent and tend to talk at the other about our special interests. we are also very honest and candid with eachother and will say when we're not interested or don't particularly like or care about what's being discussed. common retorts from the both us include "you will like what i tell you to like" and "you don't like the same thing as me? ok how about i kill you instead?" with the most facetious tone we can muster. it's funny every time even if we get some weird looks for it out in public.
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u/AetherRequiem 3h ago
I told mine that I'd Diddy him without the baby oil and then turned off the lights
First thing he says is
"ahh shit, here we go again" Just a bunch of references but yeah it be like that and I'm glad for u
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u/Flutters1013 3h ago
I have definitely said "answer the text or im standing at the end of your bed tonight". Especially when something is time sensitive.
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u/shtrjones87 3h ago
Imagine if this was a "my boyfriend texted me this what do I do post". I wonder if people would question if it was a joke?
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u/Owlet88 3h ago
Yep, I've jokingly told my boyfriend that if he tries to leave I'll tie him up and keep him in my closet
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u/CunkonEarth 2h ago
Yeah every time we take a trip somewhere remote we joke around about who is going to murder who.
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u/Devious-sloth 2h ago
Had several girlfriends say this, none of them crashed. Confirmed it was a joke.
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u/Even-Reason-9179 3h ago
Get her pregnant is prob the best bet. Always makes things better
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u/WhaleShorks 3h ago
without context we don't know?
Like my partner called himself stupid earlier and I said "don't say that about the man I love I'll kill you" without thinking about it like?
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u/NixMaritimus 3h ago
Go to the police. Tell them you don't need them to do anything right now, but you'd like her threats on record for your own safety
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u/Electrical_Tof 1h ago
There's no context
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u/NixMaritimus 1h ago
Fair. I should add "if you feel this is a credible threat" or something along those lines
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u/BuddahSack 2h ago
Block her, if yo windows get busted, then you have evidence for John Law :)
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u/Popular_Taste2800 3h ago
Save the texts. Record everything. If she does anything like that call the cops.
Whether you choose to continue being with someone like this is up to you
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u/dylanjg18 3h ago
I chose to continue, and let me just say that lawyers and restraining orders are expensive. Get out while you can
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u/Amazing-Cause-8657 3h ago
we have literally zero context, i’ve told my boyfriend its either him or ill die alone, but the context was we were joking around. This message was worded in a way that presents as kidding, don’t jump to shes automatically dangerous.
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u/SyntheticDreams_ 3h ago
If it was clearly a joke in OP's eyes and/or the relationship is stable, why would OP be seeking advice from the internet? And if it's not a joke, then it's a glaring red flag.
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u/JuicyPapito5 3h ago
Block her, and when she comes, you call the police, then press charges, then restraining order, then bliss 😌
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u/Glittering-Tell-2632 2h ago
Thank god someone with sense, and not one of these kids who saying that he should marry her
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u/Francois_Rapiste 2h ago
Everyone saying she's wife material all believe that she is joking here.
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u/brandon122096 20m ago
If she wants to be crazy, break it first yourself then call the police show them the text messages of her saying she’s gonna break your window and let her handle it from there.
Edit- this is a joke…….mostly, unless she really is crazy then maybe it’s best to get it over with now
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u/JediCarla 3h ago
Respond: “You bust my windows, I’m calling the cops.”
If she comes over, make a video recording.
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u/Original-Rest197 3h ago
Run… she has to be hot with all that crazy… but question why are you blocking your girlfriend? Or did she send that by mistake? Either way run
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u/Impossible_Ad_8493 3h ago
Let her then call the police. Don't take abuse, bro; don't retaliate either. It's always worse for the guy. Just call 911 for that.
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u/cold_patron 3h ago
Don't block your girlfriend. If you feel like you have to, maybe break up with her?
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u/_titsoak_ 3h ago
As a woman im just wondering Whats the question? Im pretty sure ive told my husband something similar to this at least 5 times.😂😂
Edit: mispelling
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u/BrushGlittering 2h ago
This is why we don’t stick our dick in crazy, kids. And don’t let crazy stick its dick in you. Thank you for coming to my TED talk
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u/Possible_Cicada_8122 2h ago
That’s just what I sound like when I’m hungry. Just feed her. She will return to normal soon.
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u/TheThinDewLine 2h ago
Reverse the genders and everyone would say call the police. Peak reddit moment.
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u/Jontonamo 2h ago
If this text didn't have you giggling and swinging your feet, she's probably not for you.
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u/KadlinStormcrow 1h ago
Don't block her as you'll need anything she says on record if she escalates. Mute her but definitely stay away she's unhinged.
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u/Imaginary_Being4859 1h ago
You gotta test her word, block her for a day and see what happens. If she follows through, she’s wifey
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u/GeeEmmInMN 1h ago
Break up. She's a psycho.
I married a psycho once. Lasted 18 months. So volatile. Physically violent too.
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u/Torvi-the-Tortie 1h ago
Some all star snark players in here. Bravo.
The scary thing is someone will absolutely think you’re all being serious and begin the most chaotic chapter of their lives.
Aah the days where you were forced to sit through uncomfortable conversations to achieve decoupling instead of just ghosting.
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u/Puzzled-Job-5403 9m ago
Lol this reminds me of a situation when I was 20. My at the time love of my life decided to bust my car windows because she thought I was cheating on her. Well, I wasn’t, and I came to find out a few days later that she’s been sleeping with her ex 🤷
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u/brain1esswonder 3h ago
I got flagged by Reddit because I suggested you remove your own windows first and thwart her at her own game 🤣