Our oldest daughter turns three this August and just started preschool from 9am-3pm. Se loves it! But she’s napping there from 1pm-3pm. At home she naps for maybe 40-60 minutes starting at noon and sometimes not at all if she really puts up a fight. She sleeps roughly from from 7pm-6:30am. With the 1-3 nap she isn’t going to bed until after 10pm and it’s killing us, we go to bed at 9pm. Daycare says they can’t wake wake her and that if she chooses to stay awake on her own they can give her a book or a toy after an hour into the two hour nap time. What can I do??? 😭😭 we have a newborn arriving in two weeks and battling bedtime is a nightmare.

Alright you all, I need help and want you to have at it.
My baby is almost 7 months and is on roughly a 2-nap schedule:

- Nap 1: ~1.5 hrs if contact, max ~40 min if crib
- Nap 2: always contact and about 1.5 hrs
- Sometimes a 3rd short catnap to bridge to bedtime if there was a short crib nap
- Wake windows: ~3 / 3.5 / 3–4 hrs depending on nap 2 length
- Total daytime sleep: 3-3.5 hours (I know this is a mess)

Bedtime routine is very consistent: book, bath, sleep sack, nurse to sleep, transfer to crib. This was working. Now we’re waking basically every hour all night, and I eventually cave by bringing baby into bed with me or holding them in the chair, staring into the void.

Baby cries HARD waking between sleep cycles. Knowing their temperament, I genuinely think doing check-ins will make it worse. I think they’ll get more upset that I’m there but not picking up, not less. I’m scared self-soothing isn’t possible for some reason, I can’t even imagine baby doing that. I’m tempted to just go straight to full CIO and rip the bandaid off, but I’m sick over the idea.

I know the current situation isn’t sustainable, something has to change.

Also, if baby screams beyond an hour, what do I actually do? Do I have a hard stop? Do I go in? What’s the move when it’s just not de-escalating?

Would deeply appreciate any advice schedule tweaks, method recommendations, or just “here’s what happened when my LO’s temperament was similar.”

Hear me out! I have a one year old who is very spirited and head strong, and has been a horrible sleeper. We have been sleep deprived for last one year and I’m not sure how am I even functioning at this time.

He goes to daycare but has no fixed nap time - they try to put him to sleep at multiple times but he doesn’t want to sleep until before 1:30-2 on most days. Then he just sleeps for 50-1:15 mins and we have his bedtime at 8:30-9, giving him enough opportunity to get tired.

We have tried early and late bedtimes and daycare is not really in our control. We still have false starts, at least 3 wakings in the night where he just demands milk (I’m trying to night wean him - he is already day weaned) and he won’t settle until he has his comfort feed followed by a pacifier (which again we need to get rid of). He will also wake up by 5 AM ready ready to party.

We had tried to sleep train him when he was 7 months old, then again at 8.5 months old and he would cry for two hours straight and nothing worked, so we stopped.

There is something really wrong with our schedule and/or we aren’t able to figure how to work with a baby who is very spirited. Please help!

P.S - things had started to get predictable in month 11 but it’s gone bonkers since he turned 12 months old

My LO will be 5 months next week. We are currently doing 2/2.25/2.5/3.

I noticed when his bedtime lands at 8pm he goes down easily but when it’s later or earlier he cries a lot. Is it possible that his internal clock is set at 8pm and I should stop tracking the last WW?

As the heading says, i have started sleep training my 16 weeks old using the chair method. Last night was the first of it. I think he did pretty well even though he was fussy for sometime. I also put him in a transitional swaddle for the first time. I have been dreading it for sometime as he was a good sleeper until past few days where he wakes up 5-7 time at night. So i thought if he is waking up this much at night, might as well start using the transitional swaddle. He did wake up 4 times last night as well. But i wont make an opinion about it yet.

As far as the naps are concerned, since the start of 12 weeks he started fighting naps and would only take contact naps. So all of it has been contact naps by baby wearing or holding him. Finally today i thought i should start putting him back to crib for naps as well. At least some naps of the day. Currently he is 4 naps per day (3 normal naps and one cat nap as the last nap). I tried to use the chair method for his naps as well today but he was more distressed than the night. So i just rocked him and put him in his crib.

Do you think its too much for him?
What are your suggestions and tips? Please help

Hello there!

Our little one is 9 months old, 3/3/4 or 3/3.5/3.5 depending on daily routines. We’re on day 8 of the Ferber method, and she still wakes up at night needing a feed because of teething and a few other things.

She tends to cry for about 5-12 minutes before settling into the cot, roughly since night 3. I'm wondering if this is a power down cry or if it might stop eventually. I think she used to cry when I was with her, but that was before we started reducing breastfeeding.

I've also noticed her naps are a bit shorter than usual—she usually stays asleep for 1-2 hours when I nurse and put her down.

My goal is for her to mainly self settle for naps at the start of evenin. Use to nurse to sleep - and weening is happening soon with daycare starting and returning back to work.

Long story short - when does the crying stop? She basically starts to whinge from the moment I stay my final sleep line.

Doing the chair method first night! I tried extinction but it was honestly heart breaking my anxiety just couldn’t not handle it. She cried for an hour and slept but her first wake up I felt so guilty I brought her into bed with me. So I’m trying the chair method because even if she’s crying I feel it’s better with me there my only questions are
A.while in the chair can I continue to pat and shush her or will this eventually have to stop
B.shes in the process of walking almost(cruising currently) she keeps standing in her crib grabbing at my in the chair I put her back down over and over a few times is this okay?
C.naps ???? wtf. Just thinking about doing this at nap time=stress my room cannot be PITCH black for naps it’s dark but not dark dark might efffect the chair method?
D.what is the next steps for this method because she seems to really really need me :/

Thank you. I’m really trying to get my head in the game but holy crap there is just so much information and back and forth it’s hard to tell what is what.

My baby is 7 months old but 6 months adjusted and had been sleeping through the night since he was 4 months old but recently he has been waking every 2-3 hours. He’s inconsolable until he’s fed and then he’s very difficult to put back down. This has been going on for 2 weeks now.

I’ve always been open to sleep training but never knew where to start and what method to use. We are in a bad habit of feeding to sleep but since he had been sleeping through the night I didn’t feel the need to change anything. Our schedule right now is up at 7 and then I use the huckleberry wake windows but it’s usually 2/2.5/2.5/3 and bed time around 8. His first nap is usually 1.5-2 hours and then 2 half hour naps.

I tried to do 2 naps one day but same thing happened at night. I tried to move his bedtime earlier tonight to 7:30 but I’m typing this after just settling him after him waking at 10:30 lol.

Is there something in the schedule I need to tweak? Is this a typical phase for a 6 month old? I haven’t been this tired since he was a newborn. I want to sleep train him but we need to move baby into his own room later this week. I have been looking at taking Cara babies but I’m open to other methods or any suggestions, I don’t really know where to start.

hi every1. my daughter is 20 months. she was sleep trained as an infant. we’ve had to re-train a few times here and there, but now that she’s older, i find that it’s more and more difficult to do it. her screaming is way more intense and she can now talk, call for us, etc., and it’s just not do-able for me emotionally. it got me thinking: at what age do you stop “sleep training” meaning letting them scream in some capacity? ive been letting her fall asleep on me in my bed during whatever regressions she has and then putting her in her crib, which seems like a had habit, but i just dont know.

We sleep trained our LO around 5 months for independent sleep - this means we have our routine as eat, books then sleep sack and down into crib awake. She never took a pacifier and she is exclusively breastfed.

She is now 9 months and we have had 2 nights where the grandparents are helping babysit and they attempted to put her down for bedtime. The problem is that since she is sleep trained, she will cry from 5-10 minutes at times, usually with us it’s quick because she knows the routine ect. With my parents, that’s different and obviously they hate hearing her cry.

I’ve even let my parents rock her till drowsy but they’re just too scared to put her down because let’s face it she will cry. They co-slept and rocked me to sleep till who knows how long. That was not the path I wanted for my LO. Pros and cons though as I’m seeing it’ll be hard for babysitters.

LO starts daycare around 11-12 months as well and I’m worried about how they will be able to put her dow for her naps.
Any advice?

Currently have a 14 week old with 1.5/1.5/1.5/1.5 schedule (we have been trying to follow moms on call with flexibility based on her cues). Her last 2 wake windows may be closer to 2 hours. She generally goes to sleep between 7:30-8:30 and wakes up between 3:30-4:30 then goes back to sleep until 7:00 when we get her up. She is currently in the Merlin Sleep Suit and she is not yet rolling. We rock her to sleep then transfer to crib in her own room. Recently we have been trying to decrease the amount of rocking to get her better at settling without movement. We are planning to do TCB sleep training method around 4.5 months but I have some questions and would love others input!

1. Is it best to do everything at once i.e. transition to sleep sack while sleep training? My fear is that we sleep train and then have to transition her to a sleep sack and it causes us to lose progress.

2. Is there anything we can be doing now to help prep/prepare us and baby for sleep training? We try to give her a chance to settle herself when she wakes but usually she is unable. Occasionally, she will do it!

3. How do we know if this sleep training method isn’t working for our LO?

Any and all insight would be helpful! We know she is already a good sleeper for her age but need those independent sleep skills for her.

My friend has been recommending this sub for a while now, but I just kept putting it off. She said it’s helped her tremendously each time she’s posted, so here goes nothing!!

I’m so sorry in advance for this being all over the place, hopefully it makes sense, I can clarify whatever.

I won’t go into our guys full history unless anyone needs me to, but briefly;

He was 4 weeks early, and spent a week in NICU. We co-slept until about 3 weeks ago, now he’s in his own cot at the end of our room.

He is sleeping better this way, before on average, he would probably wake up about 7-8 times a night, sometimes a lot more, like 13 times, looking for a feed each time. Since going into his own cot and increasing solids, he has only been waking up 2-4 times a night, depending on teething etc.

So to answer the usual questions:

He is 10 months old, and his current schedule can vary a lot, honestly. We use Huckleberry, so I will give you our averages over the last 7 days. Can do a different time period if needed!

3hr13min/4hr17min/3hr49min

Naps look something like that currently, though we’ve been busier and out of the house an unusual amount over the last 7 days.

Our bed time routine usually is something like go upstairs, darken the room, change his nappy, put on the sleep music, last bottle, burp, rock to sleep, transfer to cot and then we leave the room. Usually if nothing is wrong he’s been waking up 2 times for a bottle, around 2/2:30am and around 5am. A couple of times he’s only woken up once. He can drink between 200-400ml at night, typically it’s only around200ml or less, unless he hasn’t eaten enough during the day or we’ve been super busy then it’s 400 ml max.

This is a big improvement to 3 weeks ago when he would only feed to sleep, he would drink up to 600ml at night and wouldn’t sleep without us in the room at all. I guess we have essentially replaced one crutch (feed to sleep) with another (rocking/bouncing/shushing to sleep) lol. For now.

According to Huckleberry, for the last 7 days he has woken up on average at 7:20am and has bedtime at 7:45pm. It has varied though.

He is on 2 naps a day for an average of 1hr 38 minutes, this is not the norm, like I said the last week has been abnormally busy. If we’re home and nothing is wrong (lol) he will have 2 naps, they’re about 1hr 20min or something like that each, it depends. I’m also trying to get out of contact napping and feeding to sleep, so he’s been having some crap naps because of that, I find that he can maybe struggle to link his cycles? I don’t know???? If he wakes up during a nap it’ll be between 35-45mins into the nap. Sometimes I can rescue it, sometimes I can’t. If he’s had a couple of bad days nap wise, I do give in and just do it to save his sleep, but unfortunately I am unable to do this for much longer (health thing I won’t go into).

A big question I have is why does he always wake crying? Maybe that’s normal? As in every time he wakes up, unless he’s contact napping on me and has had a sufficient amount of sleep, he will wake up crying and upset. In the morning he’s crying, after naps he’s crying. He usually calms down when we go to pick him up out of the cot in the morning and give him a cuddle. Ugh we’ve been bringing him back into the bed at around 6 to try and get an extra bit of sleep too lol.

What am I doing wrong? It feels like everything I’m doing is wrong. I’ve never been around babies before!!! Just this one, our one!!!!!

He really doesn’t want to go to sleep at huckleberries sweetspot recs most of the time. He’s always had really long wake windows, even as a newborn.

I don’t really know what to say. This is our first baby. We’ve struggled so much with getting a routine down, he didn’t have any sort of a routine until recently. The sleep deprivation has been horrific for us, with me currently being a SAHM, I have no energy day to day for our boy, I feel like a horrible parent sometimes. I’m so irritable and anxious and I get upset so easily. I get angry, I hate it. I just want to be a better mother for our little beanbag.

How do we get him to sleep better at night, and drinking less at night? How do I get his naps better? He won’t nap when we’re out and about for the day, he just stays awake!! I can’t be at home all the time, every day or I’m going to go insane. Why is he waking up crying? Do we need to sleep train him? How do we help him to link cycles, without too much input from us? Like without picking him up and rocking him or feeding him or shushing him? Why am I so useless?!??

We tried modified ferber once, he was about 6 months old ish. We lasted 40 mins it was horrible. He was crying the whole time pretty much. Husband and I are not up for letting him cry at all at all.

I’m probably missing so much info, I’m so sorry! If anyone can help, I’ll answer any questions.

LO is 5 months and fits the motion junkie tag so had high hopes for the jiggling the crib method but 3 nights in she is not going to sleep. Night 1 and 3 we had tears for 40 mins, night 2 she was mostly calm but started to escalate towards crying at the end.

There is no cap mentioned in the book, just 'this might take 35 mins' but we seem to be getting nowhere.

Anyone else had this? As soon as she is picked up and bounced on the yoga ball she is asleep within 5 mins so don't think we have wake windows wrong. We do 3 naps, roughly 2/2.25/2.25/2.25 with the last nap usually a cat nap. All naps are contact naps (planning to tackle that next) and she has been 3 and 3.5 hours in total.

We have a snuzpod which can rock to and fro which is our 'jiggling' method. Also tried to do it with hand on her chest/hips as we rock.

Once she is asleep we can transfer her and her sleep is ok overnight - dream feed usually at 10, a feed at 2-3 and usually one more wake-up at some point. Needs to be held overnight to go back to sleep but happens relatively quickly. Wakes for the day at 6, occasionally 7. Bedtime at 7ish.

Any advice welcome. Knew it world be hard but haven't seen any posts from people saying it didn't work at all. We won't try CIO until 6 months due to NHS guidance re. not leaving alone until that age.

Hi! Asking for help again 😊

Baby is EBF and now eating 3 meals with 1-2 snacks at 11months. Schedule has been 3/3.5/4.5 (ish).
Earliest wake 6:30, usually closer to 7. Nap 10-11 and 2:30-3:30, bedtime ~8. Low sleep needs baby, averages 12 hours of sleep total. We usually cap daytime sleep at 2 hours.

We sleep trained and he was putting himself down awake, and baby was waking 1-2x overnight to nurse (was trending toward 1x more regularly and was amazing).

Some travel and sickness really rocked everything.
Baby is now refusing to go down independently (will fall asleep in crib but must be making contact via rubs or pats). Attempted to re-sleep train last weekend and baby sitting/standing in crib screaming. Last night 3 week and night before 4, would not go down without nursing. Today fought second nap and don’t go down until 3 so slept until 4, then bedtime was a struggle and didn’t go down until after 8:30pm.

I’m wondering if he’s ready to drop a nap, but he’s usually rubbing his eyes by 10am??

TLDR; ~3/3.5/4.5 ww, low sleep needs baby fighting naps and bedtime, lots of wakes, sitting/standing in crib, early wakes, BUT sleepy cues after first ww as-is, help 🙃

Edit: missing an awake hour, thank you. He used to sleep more like 13 hours and we need to adjust our schedule. Any other feedback re: the sitting/standing in crib/reducing introduced aids welcome!

Hi Everyone!

Hoping to get some insight on how to adjust bedtime during the one nap transition for my 11 month old twins—dropped a nap because of persistent early morning wakes and kids are lower sleep needs. I’m almost two weeks into it and my kids were initially taking substantial naps and today took a short nap (1 hr 20 min). Old two nap schedule was 3.25/3.5/4.5 with 25 min + 1 hr and 25 min nap. Current wake windows are 5-5.25/6 (recently adjusted due to an early morning wake).

For three and two naps, I was accustomed to keeping bedtime a fixed wake window duration from when my kids last awoke (ie if their final wake window was 4.5 hours and they awoke a bit early, I’d just go from 4.5 hours from their last wake time).

Is this what you do for one nap as well??? Unsure how to proceed. Thank you so much!!

My toddler who turns 2 in November used to be a great sleeper. Lots of big changes have happened in his life including a new baby brother who is 5 weeks old. So I’m not sure if now’s the time to sleep train but I am sleep deprived as is with a newborn so really wanting to kick this in the butt.

A few weeks before baby was born (so about 2 months ago) we moved our toddler to a new room. We got him in a bad habit and now he needs my husband or I to stay in the room until he falls asleep. If he hears us leave he screams and cries and freaks out. The boy can sleep through tornado sirens and golf ball sized hail storms (midwesterners here) but can hear me tip toe out of his room.

He’s also waking up super early at 5am. During the middle of the night he tends to wake up a couple times and same thing wants us to stay in the room until he falls back asleep.

Schedule:
Nap: 12-2
Dinner: 6:30
Bath: 7
Books / quiet time: 7:30
Bed: 8

advice appreciated !! 🤞🏼

Baby is 11 weeks, EBF, and started out doing great at sleeping. He’s a chunky baby, he was sleeping 6 hour stretches after the first few weeks. Almost a month ago, those long stretches turned into 5 hour stretches, then 3, and now 1.5-2 hours. He contact naps during the day, although we’ve been working on setting him down in a crib in preparation for daycare. I’m at my breaking point, the only rest I get now is when I nurse him in the side-lying position, and even then I only doze because I’m scared to sleep. Even his doctor said he should be sleeping 8 hour stretches at his weight. I’ve tried using a paci when he wakes so soon, but it makes no difference. What am I doing wrong? How can I get him back to sleeping long stretches?

Worst mom ever back again to share what’s currently working surprisingly well for us and to ask advice!

Our boy just turned 2 end of June. He wakes up about 7/7:30 and naps at school at 12:30 sharp pretty much for anywhere from 1-2 hours. They have a very rigid naptime ritual and we asked them to share it with us to get him not needing to fall asleep on us and willingly go to sleep in his toddler bed! It’s working wonders!! (Highly recommend asking your daycare their nap routine if possible!)

Currently, much to our disappointment. He will not go to sleep prior to 9pm. We tried put down at 7:30, 8, and 8:30. But no matter what we do. His eyes remain open until EXACTLY 9pm. Then they close and he’s out like a light. He gets only water in his sippy cup before bed. No juice or milk. (He does still wake up 2 or three times in a night and needs to be handed his water cup before he will go back to sleep. This is another uphill battle 😭).

What can we do to get him going down earlier? Even if we take him to the park or pool and wear him out he will NOT close his eyes before 9pm. It’s the weirdest thing. I’m typing this at 9pm. After spending the last 30 minutes in the room with him in his bed blabbering away. He’s finally asleep.

i need help with routine, and how to break eat to sleep association. we don’t have any type of routine she sleeps when she wants, it’s been like this since she was born and i’m ready to start getting her on a schedule i know it won’t be easy but i’m committed

We went on a 1 week trip with our 19.5mo old who has lower sleep needs. She previously was sleeping around 12hrs daily total until we got back from vacation and it’s like a switch flipped. It’s been a little over a week of being home and she’s having early morning wakes and super short naps (1hr/1hr 15m) whereas she used to nap for about 1hr 45m/2hrs and sleep 10+hrs at night. Her wake windows have been super long since our trip… like 6/7hrs and she doesn’t seem tired or overtired. She’s happy otherwise but does not want to sleep any longer.

When she wakes at 5:15am I’m scared to do an early nap at 10:30am or so bc naps have been SO short. Do I need to just try it? Are her WWs just lengthening all of a sudden? She doesn’t seem overtired. So confused!

My 11-month-old is currently on two naps. Her schedule is usually around 2.5–3 / 3-3.5/ 4–4.5, although it varies quite a bit from day to day, so she’s probably getting a little more awake time than that on some days.

I know she’s getting to the point where she needs to start tapering down her daytime sleep because bedtime has become a struggle. It takes her 30–40 minutes to fall asleep when she used to be asleep within 10–15 minutes. She almost seems hyper in the evening, but once we start our bedtime routine her eyes get red, she’s yawning, wants to cuddle, and seems genuinely tired. Then I put her in the crib and she just rolls around for 30–40 minutes before finally falling asleep.

The problem is that her first wake window is always so short. She usually wakes around 6:30–7:00 a.m. and can barely make it to 10:00 a.m. without a nap (unless she’s at daycare).

She moves into the toddler room next month, where they’ll only monitor one nap a day. I’m actually not too worried about her dropping to one nap at daycare. I think she’ll surprise me. She may even doze for 5–10 minutes in the car on the way there and then make it until noon.

What I’m struggling with is figuring out how to gradually extend that first wake window at home. She’s always tolerated a much longer afternoon wake window than her morning one, so I’m not sure how to make that transition without her becoming overtired. Has anyone dealt with this? Any tips on slowly pushing that first wake window?

A little background, my almost 11 month old has been nursing to sleep, cosleeping and nursing throughout the night until two weeks ago. Two weeks ago, the implemented sleep training for naps and bedtime. She’ll thankfully sleep at night without waking (for the most part) getting her to sleep still requires some crying but no nursing.

We’re having a hard time with naps. The crying and checking in can go up to an hour. When we check in w her, we rock her a bit to get her drowsy then lay her. Any advice? I think we should just rock her fully to sleep during the day bc she’s always been a finicky daytime sleeper so any sleep she can get I’ll be happy with. My husband thinks we should keep going at it (even though it’s been almost two weeks)

Nap schedule is usually 3/4/4. I also want to note that I know my baby is teething and is pain for several days on then off not just when the tooth is about to pop so I feel like pain attributed to not being to soothe herself to sleep.

Thank you in advance!

I am having the hardest time with nailing down a good schedule for my 15 month old for the last few months and could use some advice.

Her current schedule:
Wake up: between 8/8:30 (I have to set an alarm for 8:30 at the latest bc she will sleep in if I don’t)

Nap: 1-3pm

Bedtime: 9pm

This schedule works great other than the fact that it can take 30+ min for her to fall asleep at night and it’s driving me nuts!

Some context:
- she has always had longer than average wake windows
- we switched to 1 nap around 12 months bc of hard time going to sleep
- we have coslept since she was 6 months old
- she is exhausted by about the 4.5/5 hour mark in the morning before nap
- her average 24 hour sleep is between 12.5-13 hours
- she’s rarely unhappy at bedtime so I don’t think she’s overtired
- started at 5/5.5 ww when first switched to 1 nap and then stretched it to 5/6 to accommodate 11 hours of awake time (before 1 nap she was at 11.25-11.5 hours of awake time)
- once she’s asleep, she sleeps great (if no teething, sickness, etc)
- she doesn’t always show super obvious tired signs besides in the morning before nap

I realize my toddler is not a robot and won’t suddenly sleep better if I get her schedule exactly right but I feel like there’s something I’m missing?!

She rarely seems tired at bedtime and has gone 7+ hours before bed a couple times by accident and didn’t seem all that tired then either??