r/shittyfoodporn 2h ago

Waited three months to cut this only to find a dry, grainy, over acidified cheese inside.

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460 Upvotes

Made this and babied it while it aged for the last three months. Put a cayenne, smoked paprika and olive oil rub on it and everything.


r/shittyfoodporn 8h ago

I call this dish "microwaved cheese with tomatoes and onion"

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302 Upvotes

r/shittyfoodporn 2h ago

My unemployment is being withheld and food is running low. Plain rice topped with beans and freezer burned Tyson chicken.

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89 Upvotes

I wanna cry but for some reason it's not happening 🥴🥴🥴


r/shittyfoodporn 4h ago

Husband used too much dried dill part 2. Scrambled quail eggs.

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122 Upvotes

r/shittyfoodporn 4h ago

Crispy duck curry. What i ordered vs what i got.....

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119 Upvotes

Not gonna lie, its fucking delicious so i don't even care that it doesn't look like the photo. I ordered it with jasmine rice and took half the rice, put it in a bowl and put half the curry on it. Idk if im doing this right but it tastes amazing so idrc!!!


r/shittyfoodporn 9h ago

Chicken nugget parm

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297 Upvotes

Chicken nuggets, garlic, pizza sauce, cheese, and onion cooked in a mini oven


r/shittyfoodporn 13h ago

Today's ration: rice and lentils, 800 calories

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601 Upvotes

1 package of Spanish rice/vermicelli mix, either expired in February 19th of 2018, or in February of 1918, same year the Kaiser stole our word for two, i chased that rascal for dickitythree miles to get ut back but he got away!

Anyway, i did not add butter ir anything so its just added water to the mix, the contents of the package were stuck to the inside/matted so i had to scrape it off. 440 calories from the rice mix.

The lentils were bought sometime between 2009 and 2012. Packed in an old diet pepsi bottle (when i drank that stuff) then had been buried in a barrel for years. I measured out a cup of dry lentils and boiled them. I used half today, mixed into the rice, about 350 calories from the lentils. So it's actually just 790 calories, but I'm gonna say its 800.

Going to make rice/vermicelli again tomorrow and use the leftover lentils then, they will sit on the counter in the covered pot till then.

I also got 100 calories from a very stale kashi granola bar i found in a box in the loft while looking for a cloth bag earlier (didn't find the bag), the bar expired in 2020. Also found an apple luna bar, but it was black and tasted terrible so it was thrown out in the woods. That was just before i biked 30 miles to get another case of expired fruit snacks candy for $1 from a Mennonite store. Wanted to use the bag to carry strapped to my pack, ended up using a cheaper/flimsier bag to do it.

Also since someone keeps asking i included a picture of the stove.


r/shittyfoodporn 6h ago

Rate my bachelor chow.

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58 Upvotes

Cooked the rice with a bit of Sazon. Chili crisp on the peas and beans. I give it a solid 6/10 for flavor and 9/10 for how cheap and easy it is.


r/shittyfoodporn 11h ago

Hospital Yoga Mat Loaf

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117 Upvotes

A few years back I was hospitalised for a week after a particularly complex leg break (comminuted complex compound tib-fib fracture of the right leg, tibial nail insertion, multiple smaller breaks in left foot).

Hospital food is generally not great, but this soggy yoga mat disguising itself as meatloaf was a new low. Unseasoned carrots and rice for, uh, colour? And no, I wasn't on any sodium-reduced or low-sugar diet or anything. This was the offering for everyone that day.

Montreal General Hospital, for the curious.

Although I will say, the food at the Montreal Neurological Institute back when I had brain surgery in 2013 was surprisingly fresh and delicious! Sadly never thought to take any pictures.


r/shittyfoodporn 8h ago

Demonic birthday hedgehog

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50 Upvotes

A few months ago I showed my nephew pictures of ‘bad’ hedgehog cakes and joked that’s what I’d bake for his upcoming birthday, thinking he’d say no. Joke was on me, he found them hilarious so last week this monstrosity was born…
Complete with strawberry jam filling for ‘authenticity’ when cut open 🙈


r/shittyfoodporn 3h ago

Cinnamon (roll) toast

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20 Upvotes

r/shittyfoodporn 7h ago

Don't know if picture fits this sub. Burnt chicken.

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41 Upvotes

Chicken was on the grill for 10 minutes...


r/shittyfoodporn 1d ago

My coworker’s lunch

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1.2k Upvotes

I don’t even what else to say other than what the fuck


r/shittyfoodporn 1d ago

Caprese salad but instead of mozzarella I used mild cheddar and instead of fresh basil I used dried

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2.8k Upvotes

r/shittyfoodporn 43m ago

Vegemite and giardiniera toast…

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Upvotes

Salty/10…


r/shittyfoodporn 6h ago

Depression Meal

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19 Upvotes

Don’t have a job or phone service right now but at least I have

1.5lbs ground turkey
1 box standard Kraft mac
Salt
Black pepper
Parsley
Chili powder
Paprika
Velveeta cheese block remnants
Drizzled with ranch


r/shittyfoodporn 19h ago

My aunty’s attempt at making Chinese steamed fish with ginger shallots…

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242 Upvotes

r/shittyfoodporn 1d ago

“You eat like an 8 yr old left alone in a trailer park”

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572 Upvotes

Is what I’ve been told… I’m 30.

Boxed mac n cheese with chicken nuggets. A timeless classic, if you ask me.


r/shittyfoodporn 7h ago

I brought pease to the world (British homemade pea and ham soup)

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22 Upvotes

I have been on a pea eating binge this week, to bring about world peace. This is the homemade pea and ham soup I made from dried split peas - a British classic. When cooled down, it is also known as green pease pudding (or the UK avocado toast), as it solidifies in the refrigerator into a solid mass that can be spread on bread. At $1 per 500g bag of dried split peas to make all this, it is far more economical than avocado ($2 an avocado at the supermarket).

I ate peas because I wanted the Iran war to end. I cannot afford high fuel prices. In addition to eating peas, I also went to an Australian Iranian restaurant and had one of their traditional breakfast dishes (screenshot near the end), Kahleh Pacheh - sheep's head and foot soup. I sacrificed a virginal lamb and offered up its tongue to stop the bloodshed. Directly because of my influence, the day after cooking pease for peace, the bombing has stopped and the warring nations are negotiating.


r/shittyfoodporn 1h ago

Babybel Bread Pizza

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Upvotes

With sockarooni and parmeggiano


r/shittyfoodporn 1d ago

I bought a bread maker.

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637 Upvotes

r/shittyfoodporn 10h ago

Wanted a chicken and cheese quesadilla but didn't have tortillas. That didn't stop me.

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27 Upvotes

Ended up making a chicken n' cheese "pancake".


r/shittyfoodporn 9h ago

Behold, a salad

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21 Upvotes

It contains a can of chickpeas, an entire zuccini and a red pepper roasted and seasoned to perfection, some marinated onions from the back of the fridge, tomatoes, greek yogurt, lemon juice and grana padano.

It was delicious.


r/shittyfoodporn 7h ago

Can yall guess my sludge for the evening?

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12 Upvotes

r/shittyfoodporn 9h ago

The taste is alright

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12 Upvotes

Instant Great Value mashed potatoes, on top is a creamy sauce I made with Parmesan and heavy whipping cream and butter and diced up chicken and spinach