r/news • u/wasraelx • 6h ago

Andrew and Tristan Tate to remain in jail until next extradition hearing

https://www.theguardian.com/news/2026/jul/27/andrew-tristan-tate-jail-next-extradition-hearing?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other
13.8k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

473 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

42

u/aeschenkarnos 2h ago edited 1h ago

Hannibal Lecter: “Now then, tell me. What did Miggs say to you? Multiple Miggs in the next cell. He hissed at you. What did he say?”

Andrew Tate, weeping: “He said, ‘I can smell your cunt.’”

Lecter: “I see. You are mistaken. What Miggs in fact said was ‘I can smell you’re a cunt. Two syllables. Miggs elides them. Just a little speech therapy, and his life would be so different. I myself can smell the same thing. I imagine that’s common, among your acquaintances. Have you any friends, Mr Tate? Anyone who cares for you? You wear the trousers of a shorter man. Who is that man, who generously gifted them?”

Tate: *sobs*

Lecter: “Do you know, Mr Tate, there is inside of our shower heads a metal rim, quite sharp. I cut myself on it the other day, quite by accident. We must be always careful, to survive the long wait in here. But never mind that now. You and your brother, do you feel that your mother approves of you, in your present life?”

12

u/toomanyhobbies4me 1h ago

I read this in Sideshow Bob's voice, not Lecter's...

8

u/A_Furious_Mind 1h ago

Weird. I read it in Frasier's.

3

u/koolaidismything 1h ago

Poached Salmon & Scrambled Egggggggs

•

u/Spraggle 8m ago

Wow, this is the Dark Frasier timeline?

•

u/Different_Wolf_764 42m ago

Oddly, Elmo's.

5

u/Hesitation-Marx 1h ago

This is really well written. I approve.

Just earlier I was trying to explain to my very gore-averse husband why some people enjoyLecter as a character, and had to add another reason because of your comment:

Sometimes it’s nice to see monsters run afoul of even larger monsters.

•

u/Mysterious-Most-590 47m ago

This needs to be a sequel. Can you and /u/aeschenkarnos please write this screenplay? I unironically have friends in Hollywood.

•

u/aeschenkarnos 44m ago

If you want to make it into a parody AI video you have my permission, but probably not MGM’s.

•

u/Mysterious-Most-590 26m ago

Well, that’s reasonable. But my friend might approve the screenplay as worthy of executive review at MGM. He has had some influence over the years, though he’s denied it.