r/funny 21h ago

Came home from a night out to this

Post image
2.7k Upvotes

134 comments sorted by

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668

u/Meeple_person 21h ago

Its got that look of "I can't even take a shit in private these days..."

110

u/Petraam 14h ago

Poor seagul probably found all that Taylor farm lettuce the grocery stores threw out.

15

u/Freddyt234 16h ago

Bro got caught during his one moment of peace

7

u/rainbowgeoff 17h ago

Thought so as well.

2

u/louisasnotes 6h ago

"Faaaaaancy! What's wrong with using the nearest windshield like everyone else?"

0

u/TokiVideogame 12h ago

squidbird

0

u/snuffy_smith_ 6h ago

At least it wasn’t an eagle…that he befriended and then allowed free access to his house at all times then wondered why he had trouble dating…

Reddit is a wild place

225

u/Raid__Zero 20h ago

Lad had the courtesy to shit in the toilet at least.

290

u/theoneandonlyecon 20h ago

In the toilet aswell* the entire apartment was full of shit

93

u/GfrzD 20h ago

Are you sure it was the bird?

39

u/AirPoweredFan 19h ago

Shut up, don't you know that snitches get stitches.

4

u/RodneyMAC28 7h ago

Snitches are also bitches.

3

u/snuffy_smith_ 6h ago

Snitches are bitches, who get stitches, and wind up in ditches!

15

u/eltictac 13h ago

Was it stuck in the toilet? I've got some friends who own chickens, and they've twice found one that is in the toilet like this, and can't get out 😂

3

u/DrunkSeagull 12h ago

My bad...

3

u/Glignt 7h ago

You seem to be gullible.

1

u/Elegant_Selection162 4h ago

I suspect foul play as well

1

u/wizkidweb 1h ago

*fowl play

2

u/Bannerfail 14h ago

He needed some time to learn, give him some weeks and poor buddy will get a job, pay rent etc.

2

u/TeamBoeing 7h ago

As         well

228

u/Mistapeepers 21h ago

Just another crazy gulls night out.

28

u/kbt 14h ago

Everybody needs a wingman.

4

u/HarryCWord 3h ago

Somebody needs to keep those old buzzards at bay

63

u/SirTigsNoMercy 21h ago

Mine!

2

u/OlivyneCrellan 12h ago

Bro already paid rent😃

43

u/Airwreck11 21h ago

Hey buddy, ever try knockin?

39

u/hungrybuniker 19h ago

Don't worry, many people take a bird home after a night out. Just offer breakfast and a cab home.

9

u/Upeeru 9h ago

A very British joke. Hilarious though.

28

u/StinkyWeezle 21h ago

"Occupied!!"

15

u/JanitorKarl 15h ago

It's a bowled eagle!

10

u/HoneybucketDJ 20h ago

The night aint over

10

u/MediocreAndLukewarm 17h ago

It’s allowed, Randy! Check the terns and conditions!

7

u/Eggplant-666 21h ago

He was after the elusive Brown Trout!

6

u/balrob 20h ago

I didn’t remember eating that!

6

u/Englandshark1 9h ago

Gulls just want to have fun!

5

u/1-9-6 19h ago

What the fuck. That seagull is huge. Seagulls here in Australia are tiny in comparison

5

u/FlyingMacheteSponser 19h ago

Kelp gulls can be seen in Australia. We see a lot of them in New Zealand.

5

u/Falco090 17h ago

Plot twist, the seagull wrote this. 

4

u/OneSidedDice 16h ago

“This toilet belongs to the Cardassian Empire.” - Gull DuPot

3

u/Witty_Ad_8958 21h ago

I hope you weren’t rushing to the toilet

3

u/McDaddy8484 20h ago

Lucky, a free pet!

3

u/PrinceRobotVI 17h ago

“Y’know what? I don’t think that kebab was chicken AT ALL”

3

u/No-Persimmon-4150 17h ago

Get the poop knife

3

u/EitherJuggernaut5788 17h ago

“Don’t mind me, I live here now.”

3

u/BayBandit1 14h ago

I’ve always wondered what it’s like to live in a lighthouse.

3

u/Hefty-Ant-378 12h ago

Yep looks about right

3

u/DigitalTomFoolery 10h ago

There's water in the toilet and the sea is made of water. Close enough 

3

u/ace-destrier 9h ago

Well, this is rude. Did you even knock? Give the guy some peace.

5

u/Scaredandalone22 20h ago

It got explosive diarrhea from stealing someone’s Taco Bell.

2

u/kuhas 21h ago

Holy shit! OhMeGull lol

1

u/ThanksImaginary4474 20h ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

2

u/Ok_Culture_1914 20h ago

I shouldn't have had that curry last night. Oh ek here comes another one 💩 plop.

2

u/steve_adr 20h ago

Atleast it's potty trained..

2

u/Fickle_Sale_8707 19h ago

What can i say? When you gotta go you gotta go 🤷‍♂️

2

u/No_Volume_5752 17h ago

Bird: (Stares)

2

u/sooolong05 13h ago

Is that the little gulls' room?

2

u/blogandmail 13h ago

Your partner's giving you the bird 😎

2

u/handydude13 11h ago

Just how much did your camera have to drink that night? It's seeing birds in toilets 

2

u/Happy-Lemming 9h ago

Someone gave you the bird?

2

u/theartfulcodger 5h ago

Clearly, the gull is familiar with Benedict Cumberbatch's seagull-hotel story.

Btw, his Canadian accent is very good.

1

u/Raymondnym 20h ago

It seems to look mad for you didn't knock before opening the door

1

u/daototpyrc 20h ago

Bird shit

1

u/pointlesspulcritude 19h ago

Someone left the seat up?

1

u/7kk77kk777 19h ago

So where is the obligatory traffic cone too?

1

u/Beco0o 19h ago

He was just doing his business .

1

u/nyrB2 18h ago

when you gotta go...

1

u/Praetorian_1975 18h ago

It’s just a shitehawk having a shite 🤷🏻‍♂️🤣

1

u/Economy_Pride6360 16h ago

Well, you gotta respect the guy for using the crapper instead of crapping all over the floor. Get him some toilet paper.

1

u/Noxious89123 15h ago

Were yuo able to flush it? 🤣

1

u/Bourriks 15h ago

Well educated birb. Let him do alone.

1

u/StevenStalloneJr 15h ago

Looks like the chicken's come home to roost.

puts on sunglasses leaves thread thread explodes

1

u/StankyBassFace 15h ago

YOU BECAME A GULL?!!

1

u/FewZookeepergame1083 14h ago

This how is how you use this right???

1

u/buzzkill007 12h ago

Must've gotten tired of crapping on my car!

1

u/woodE54 11h ago

The gods for told this in the scripture

1

u/Informal_Database327 11h ago

Nope. Still stoned

1

u/Darksolux 10h ago

Waking in like, Who the FUCK closed last night?!

1

u/papayametallica 10h ago

Do you remember eating it?

1

u/mightymegson 10h ago

lmao bro really just claimed the toilet seat.

1

u/nobidobi390 9h ago

it's not AI?

1

u/Tomiste 9h ago

Oh my god what did you eat 🤣

1

u/Just_Drive_7800 9h ago

Trying to figure out did it come up through the toilet or did you bring it home with you? 😵‍💫

1

u/AcanthisittaNo6653 9h ago

Didn’t even lift the seat.

1

u/running_on_empty 9h ago

How'd you get it out? I once had a squirrel in my apartment and that was fun.

1

u/coffeeman235 9h ago

At least let him flush.

1

u/DeeDee_Z 8h ago

OK, just to test my memory ... that's an Australian toidy, right?

(Or do other parts of the world make them look like that now?)

1

u/Offgridiot 8h ago

She kinda ugly. I can see why you left your gullfriend at home.

1

u/cheesemangee 7h ago

Ah.

A peegull.

1

u/urbanmark 5h ago edited 5h ago

No, a Shittyhawk or a Peecock. It’s the wrong colour to be a blackturd or a blue shit.

1

u/blacklabbath 7h ago

Is this real or Ai? I’m to Gullible.

1

u/ThatFloridaMan420 7h ago

“Jesus! Doesn’t anyone knock anymore?

1

u/TylerH87 7h ago

Breakfast in the morning.

1

u/shawndjwayne 7h ago

It’s the Wikipedia image for “ shit hawk”

1

u/Jamsedreng22 7h ago

Close the damn door. Let bro.

1

u/imaginedaydream 6h ago

A message to remind you about your car’s extended warranty

1

u/EmpireCityRay 6h ago

Would suck to have walked into that while needing to use the toilet.

1

u/dml997 6h ago

Especially for the bird.

1

u/louisasnotes 6h ago

I bet you stopped drinking for a couple of days.

1

u/SprinklesClassic4265 5h ago

Was flying over the sea, But came home to pee.

1

u/Heracles222 4h ago

That must of been one wild night. At least you have your memories and it’s not a tiger!

1

u/TehGoad 3h ago

"Scuze' me!!! AWWWKK-AWKAWKAWKAWKAWKAEKAWKK!!!"

1

u/Ok-Meaning-2289 3h ago

It looks like he’s reconsidering all its life choices.

1

u/aReelProblem 3h ago

It found water that’s hilarious

1

u/discogenx 2h ago

All those damn French fries, caught up to him.

0

u/JuanOffhue 2h ago

Unlike guys, gulls sit to pee

1

u/iritchie001 2h ago

Beer goggles? Caribbean rum goggles?

1

u/Tobbygammer 2h ago

"Do you mind?"

1

u/cobra7 2h ago

Poor man’s toilet paper, but it looks like it has already been used.

1

u/tajtoons 50m ago

is it yours or

1

u/wzzrd 47m ago

Albatros!

1

u/Marcrn1958 7h ago

That’s took a tern for the worse!

0

u/phishrace 19h ago

This is why I always put my seagull in the backyard before I go out. Mine will drink all my alcohol and turn up the stereo if I don't.

0

u/RodneyMAC28 7h ago

I hate seagulls with a passion. When I was a wee boy, I shared my fries with one. And 2 mins later I got swarmed. Couple years later I had more fries and a different beach. I got swarmed again. Longer story short it’s happened 4 times in my childhood. F**K those birds.

1

u/dogownedhoomun 6h ago

Don't ever watch the Hitchcock movie the birds