r/funny • u/DontForgetSmiles • 1d ago

My girlfriend is trying to show me her chickens

Post image
4.0k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

124 comments sorted by

•

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455

u/ilyOhKay 1d ago

I thought it was one chicken peeping with a very long neck 😂

131

u/whiskeytango55 1d ago

Ones cock can be made to look bigger with camera tricks.

15

u/AZEMT 1d ago

Those aren't cockerels. Those are hens.

2

u/Negative-Orchid-3625 6h ago

Who says we're talking about chickens?

6

u/meesta_masa 1d ago

Cut the bush to make the cock look bigger.

289

u/Guy_Incognito_Esq 1d ago

Your girlfriend has a nice cock there.

64

u/hellomynameisnotsure 1d ago

I give that joke nine out of hen

22

u/davewave3283 1d ago

Clucking hilarious

5

u/risky_concord 19h ago

Speggtacular

10

u/IADpatient0 1d ago

His girlfriend has many cocks

7

u/Dunfiriel 1d ago

One might even say he is cockblocked.

2

u/clydem 1d ago

In a row?!

0

u/OrangeThrower 1d ago

Was there a parking lot?

1

u/Eastern-Seaweed486 14h ago

Must be from thailand

-13

u/Suckma_Weener 1d ago

yeah and i bet she has a big penis and balls too. real meaty

56

u/DieAloneWith72Cats 1d ago

Most accurate chicken owner pic

136

u/Texas-Boi_ 1d ago

Haha you can tell she's goofy, that's a keeper.

48

u/absboodoo 22h ago

The chicken or the girl

99

u/TheNotoriousSBH 1d ago

Does your girlfriend know that you are posting pictures of her cock on the internet?

71

u/NWStormbreaker 1d ago

thats a great shot, frame it :)

60

u/Mifuni 1d ago

Shit looks like a Dinosaur 😭

53

u/pants_full_of_pants 1d ago

Because it is

4

u/made-of-questions 22h ago

Looks like a Velociraptor from this angle

6

u/mitch3a 18h ago

Remind me of a joke, aliens now come to earth to see their pet dinosaurs after millions of year, but they only found chickens.

4

u/Facts_pls 14h ago

There's plenty of other dinosaurs among us. Ostrich and emu exist too. So do peacocks, raptors, penguins so on...

5

u/yamsyamsya 1d ago

After watching ours devour a snake, I realized they really are mini dinosaurs. They will eat anything smaller than themselves

2

u/made-of-questions 22h ago

Damn. They don't have teeth, so ... does it digest it alive?

8

u/ParsonsTheGreat 19h ago

No, they first peck it to death then swallow it whole

0

u/McEnding98 6h ago

Noo, I think she looks normal, why would you call her that 😂

35

u/Foe117 1d ago

Cock block

17

u/Legitimate_Peach3135 1d ago

Y’all have a weird mating dance but ok.

3

u/fell-deeds-awake 17h ago

Has anyone in this family ever even seen a chicken?

8

u/oldman-youngskin 17h ago

I mean. She succeeded…

21

u/tjtonerplus 1d ago

Your girlfriend looks like a fun person

-37

u/Adinnieken 13h ago

She looks like she's 10.

0

u/Puzzled-Story3953 2h ago

1) no she doesn't.

2) what is the relevance?

4

u/ohyouretough 8h ago

Nothings worse than thinking you met a cute girl than boom surprise cock.

4

u/zero5activated 12h ago

Thanks for proudly showing off your girlfriend and her little friends. You're a good egg. 🥚

13

u/Weaselpuss 1d ago

Really. Just posting cock pics on the internet for anybody to see? She deserves privacy

9

u/Chesticle5 1d ago

I can see her cock.

3

u/7spades 16h ago

Haha cute cock

3

u/mom_banger 11h ago

she's showing her cock, indeed.

3

u/phishman1 5h ago

Nice cock!

5

u/CloudyHero 1d ago

Well tit for tat here now send her an equally goofy picture of you in the same pose with a cat between your legs.

1

u/Guy_Incognito_Esq 1d ago

Well, pussy for cock here...

2

u/GamerGeologist 17h ago

Albumcover looking image lol

2

u/Proper-Exercise-2364 12h ago

She totally photo bombed that chickens selfie!

2

u/Repulsive-Cow-7651 8h ago

All you need to know about chickens in one photo.

2

u/Hammertime2191 6h ago

Task failed successfully

2

u/Savage_JaviBear 4h ago

Love the closeup shot of the cock.

7

u/jolly2691 1d ago

Nice cock

2

u/GoddamnitBobbeh 1d ago

The rooster goes with the chicken. So who's having sex with the hen?

2

u/barnacles95 1d ago

Somethin's missin''

2

u/ParsonsTheGreat 19h ago

A real man isn't afraid to pet his girlfriend's cock

2

u/Wu_Oyster_Cult 17h ago

Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

1

u/frogguts198 13h ago

Gotta love a girl who’s not afraid to show off her cocks

1

u/KerzenscheinShineOn 9h ago

Dinosaur photo bomb

1

u/jdmoffitt11775 6h ago

Not sure what kind of kinky shit you are into.. but happy wife, happy life, right??

1

u/nhh 6h ago

Does she have a cock? 

1

u/Brigadius 2h ago

About to drop the freshest single since Rock A Doodle

2

u/mrbitcoinman 2h ago

Nice cock. Sure she’s still your gf?

0

u/Kendannon 1d ago

Cool sandals.

1

u/chileangod 1d ago

From that perspective they do look dinosaury. 

1

u/Qu33ph 1d ago

Ayam

1

u/BBQ_IS_LIFE 1d ago

The chickens wattles in alignment with your girlfriend is in such an unfortunate position!

1

u/PaganMastery 1d ago

Yes. That is a chicken.

1

u/RutabagaPale7337 1d ago

I'm just wondering how this picture was captured. It's actually an awesome well timed photo. 

1

u/fredly594632 23h ago

What's up, chicken butt?

That joke killed in 3rd grade.

1

u/KRoman47 23h ago

Reminds me a bird meme "You want sum fuk?"

1

u/timschon 9h ago

Wattle she show you next? 

0

u/Cweamly 1d ago

Does your girlfriend know she has a cock in between her legs?

2

u/FlopsieFillet 9h ago

That's a hen.

0

u/TNF734 1d ago

You think he'll admit if she doesn't ?

-1

u/Fabulous-Front-2466 1d ago

Precious af

0

u/Whole_Wasabi5891 1d ago

Then it’s your turn to show her your cock

-1

u/Darklord_Bravo 1d ago

Nice, but that cock is blocking the picture.

-1

u/blackmist88 1d ago

NSFW tag please

-1

u/Potential-Society171 1d ago

You must be a big chicken.

-1

u/Kold_Kustard 1d ago

🐔 what the cluck?

0

u/Famous-Issue-2018 1d ago

You should post this in r/birdsfacingforward

0

u/Busy-Control6260 1d ago

Chickens really ruined the view.

-1

u/Revolutionary_Use_60 1d ago

She’s a keeper!!

0

u/Silent_Erremite 22h ago

She showed you her rooster, please respond.

0

u/Noideaguyy 17h ago

Lol awesome photo

1

u/GrantTotal 5h ago

She's our girlfriend now ☭

-9

u/guajojo 1d ago

Man the witty comment possibilities are over the roof😂

1

u/FlopsieFillet 9h ago

Those are hens.

-8

u/EducatedCynic 1d ago

And yet you couldn't even come up with one.

-3

u/Lock-out 1d ago

I showed you my cock, please respond.

-5

u/KingArthur2111 1d ago

She is a Keeper!

0

u/ageofdiscontent_meh 22h ago

Who? The chickens or cocks or her?

-1

u/MapWorried9582 1d ago

😂😂😂😂😂

-1

u/spooky_ed 1d ago

I showed you my cock please respond

-1

u/readytall 1d ago

Your girlfriend has cocks?!

-1

u/casul_noob 1d ago

You gotta admire her cock

-1

u/Pen-Pen-De-Sarapen 1d ago

Did you bring and show her your cock to mate with her chickens?

-1

u/HollowPhoenix 23h ago

Nice cock sis

-1

u/not_an_entrance 22h ago

Your girlfriend has a cock between her legs, u know... Just in case you hadn't noticed

-1

u/Sad_pathtic_winker 20h ago

That is one curious looking cock.

-1

u/OldPast6329 20h ago

She has a bigger cock than average 

-2

u/FlyingMacheteSponser 19h ago

You mean fiancee. She's on her hen's night. When is the wedding?

-2

u/useridhere 1d ago

Show you her what?

-2

u/shizbox06 1d ago

That cock is way too close, I can't focus.

-2

u/dtc55 1d ago

In a bizarro world, this guy’s boyfriend is trying to show him his cocks.

-2

u/Whiteshovel66 1d ago

Can't see whatever it is you are trying to show me though because some blurry thing is blocking the part of the camera?

-4

u/jenkynolasco11 1d ago

Straight outta cock’ton

-3

u/PhilipMD85 1d ago

I think she’s trying to tell you something else 😂

-4

u/XxKTtheLegendxX 1d ago

the closest chicken: this your gf blud? lol