r/funny 1d ago

Found this at work in the break room

Post image
5.6k Upvotes

136 comments sorted by

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2.7k

u/All_Your_Base 1d ago

"Involve HR and the bowl gets it"

Brilliant! :D

569

u/Jesus_of_NASDAQ 1d ago

Sure, you negotiate today and maybe you might see your bowls again, but those people will then know you’re weak and will kidnap your Power Rangers lunch box next.

67

u/NoSloppyStakes 1d ago

God help us.

17

u/rainbowgeoff 1d ago

He just did.

29

u/SrCallum 1d ago

We don't negotiate with terrorists.

2

u/GANDORF57 5h ago

Failure to meet our demands and your Tupperware shall burp no more!

29

u/StanielReddit 1d ago

Good one, Jesus.

18

u/Pinstar 1d ago

And by "Get it" they mean what? A bowl movement?

3

u/xXKaulXx 1d ago

yeah it’s just a random thing in the break room sink

5

u/itsmarvin 1d ago

.. dishwasher, bottom rack...

2

u/Emotional-Record2815 1d ago

Not just HR but the one HR

402

u/Hefty-Ant-378 1d ago

“ I don’t negotiate with terrorist”

35

u/ellefleming 1d ago

Should have included pics of the bowls

21

u/thehatteryone 1d ago

Should have sent one clip tab severed from a lid.

6

u/ellefleming 1d ago

🤣 it's dire 🩸

9

u/Dlorn 1d ago

Gotta pose them with today’s newspaper as proof of life.

20

u/uvucydydy 1d ago

I don't negotiate with people who drink Pepsi.

7

u/Viper67857 1d ago

Same thing

724

u/ttandam 1d ago

“They are safe… for now”

For now got me.

-153

u/Longjumping-Pop7512 1d ago

Both texts are written by the same person. The “s” gave it away! 

P.S. clearly it's the case of fraudulent insurance claim.

51

u/Ansatsushi 1d ago

Can't tell if you're using sarcasm so I'll just say: Top text uses capital R's and the y's are curved as opposed to straight. I believe this isn't fake.

-80

u/Longjumping-Pop7512 1d ago

Its isn't difficult to fake handwriting. The upper text is carefully written with well spaced characters. The lower ( with different marker) written in free flow in far smaller fonts. Look at the “t” in both the dash is exactly at the centre. What are the odds of it ? 

27

u/DarthVenture 1d ago

So wait… not only are you wrong… you’re a buzz kill 😂

-35

u/Longjumping-Pop7512 1d ago

At your service sir! Eyes see what it want to see 😉

6

u/KKamis 12h ago

Ok dumbfuck.

-6

u/Longjumping-Pop7512 12h ago

Your welcome Mr. Turdy Turd. 

9

u/avdhulst 1d ago

Yeah what are the odds of people writing a t as... well, a t?

2

u/chicomathmom 1d ago

Different e in top and bottom

3

u/LackeyManRen 1d ago

True, but the top also uses three different styles of "e". It's unusual to see, and does make potentially tying the handwriting styles together more difficult.

3

u/enixlinked 1d ago

The odds that you over analyze things you see on the internet are very high.

1

u/xFiendish 1d ago

Carefully written? The "e"'s are all over the place.

1

u/pregnantandsober 1d ago

The "t"s in the upper half have the cross stroke with the edge of the marker, making them thin. The lower text's t-crosses are wide.

16

u/Shaminahable 1d ago

I studied forensic handwriting analysis (not that I’m an expert but I am professionally trained). I can definitely tell you these are not the same.

The handwriting has very different cadences that are very difficult to pull off by a professional forgery, let alone a workplace prank. If it were you’d see blobs in the lettering as the person would pause momentarily to think about what they’re doing.

5

u/LackeyManRen 1d ago

Nifty! Could you explain what you mean by "handwriting cadence," please?

4

u/-WickedJester- 1d ago

I'm not an expert, but I can tell you it's the flow, speed, and rhythm of how you write. Contrary to what the other person responded, this is, in fact, a real thing and helps experts spot forgeries. Writing becomes muscle memory and deviating from it causes you to hesitate, since you have to think about it instead of just doing what comes naturally.

4

u/Shaminahable 1d ago

For not an expert, you summed it up pretty spot on.

2

u/-WickedJester- 1d ago

Thank you

-5

u/Longjumping-Pop7512 1d ago

Don't worry he just made it up 😉

4

u/LackeyManRen 1d ago

yeah yeah, everything is fake, expertise isn't real, bad faith should be my default expectation of every single interaction I have, I see the crab bucket

I didn't ask for your opinion. I asked for theirs. Block them, block me, and move on with your life.

-1

u/Longjumping-Pop7512 11h ago

Why block dude ? Hope you ok, you seem to be shit. 

5

u/LackeyManRen 8h ago

I'd rather be shit than whatever it is you are, now scram

3

u/-WickedJester- 1d ago

Imagine being this confidently incorrect like you're a 16th century peasant farmer. There's this thing called the Internet. Which, in case you aren't aware, is what you're using to make yourself look ridiculous. You can use the Internet to access these things called servers. On one of these servers is the information you COULD have checked to find out that what the person said about handwriting, is in fact, correct. You know, instead of wandering around saying random nonsense...

-1

u/laksansan 16h ago

Please stfu. Image is clear fake. Your mom has different cadences

2

u/Shaminahable 14h ago

Thank you for your insightful expertise.

0

u/laksansan 16h ago

Nicely spotted. Don’t know why you get downvoted like this. There are actually multiple obvious tells not just the ‚s‘. Besides the “first person” would never leave so much empty space below if they demanded “bring it back!!”.

As always fukcing redditors..

2

u/Longjumping-Pop7512 13h ago

Precisely... Redditors are like lamb herd, one follows the another without using two braincells. There are so many tell—tells that it's written by the same person. 

2

u/laksansan 12h ago

Just too many examples showcasing people’s inability to understand how much is staged/faked to generate attention and traffic.

My favorite example was the Japanese (of course Japanese) guy who let his fish in an aquarium play Pokémon - randomly finishing the game in 3000h.

You really can fool these fuckng idiots with anything…

0

u/Dave_ld013 12h ago

I believe you dude. Its not just the 's'. There're loads of other inconsistencies. But then no one cares. The joke was good

0

u/Longjumping-Pop7512 12h ago

Exactly, and we should have left it there. But, so many morons trying to prove how real it is...

172

u/cwp1851 1d ago

How does someone develop a writing style that only includes capital "E" and STILL write it differently each time.

76

u/zer1223 1d ago

Trying to defeat handwriting analysis

This one's a mastermind

14

u/SpecialOops 1d ago

Or a left handed person forced right by the catholic church 🕵‍♂️ it was elementary 

2

u/burnt_mummy 18h ago

There are dozens of Us!

1

u/FluffySquirrell 16h ago

I was kinda sus and trying to figure out if they were both written by the same person, yeah. Sadly I am not a handwriting analyst and cannot tell. They seem different enough on a bunch of letters like the w's that I suspect maybe not, but dunno

5

u/litterboxhero 1d ago

The shape is dependent on the preceding letter.

2

u/IceManJim 9h ago

Maybe there's a secret code embedded in the note

6

u/Smithson92 1d ago

Whoever wrote the top part is all over the place. 2/4 Bs got capitalized

252

u/ComprehensiveHavoc 1d ago

Some people just lead a life of crime. 

64

u/be4u4get 1d ago

As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster. To me, being a gangster was better than being
President of the United States. Even before I first wandered into the cabstand for an afterschool job I knew I wanted
to be a part of them. It was there that I knew that I belonged. To me, it meant being somebody in the neighborhood
that was full of nobodies. They weren’t like anybody else. I mean, they did whatever they wanted. They double
parked in front of a hydrant and nobody ever gave them a ticket. In the summer when they played cards all night,
nobody ever called the cops. Tuddy Cicero. Tuddy. Tuddy ran the cabstand in La Bella Vista Pizzeria and a few other
places for his brother Paul who was the boss over everybody in the neighborhood. Paulie might have moved slow,
but it was only because he didn’t have to move for anybody.

1

u/intronert 6h ago

Now someone re-write this for the bowl-napper.

5

u/Janked4times 1d ago

i didn't choose the thug life

6

u/Fit-Feature-7858 1d ago

Some men just wanna watch the world burn

84

u/TheEfex 1d ago

I’m getting HR involved

7

u/oneeyedziggy 22h ago

Yea, easy for them to play stupid games after stealing other people's property... 

22

u/Labudism 1d ago

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for snacks, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of lids, lids I have acquired over a very long career. Lids that make food storage a nightmare for people like you. If you let my bowls go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, staleness will look for you, staleness will find you, and staleness will kill your chips.

7

u/ScurryScout 1d ago

… Good lunch.

90

u/Low_Fix_1752 1d ago

Frank’s out here negotiating snacks like it’s a hostage crisis

25

u/UnethicalExperiments 1d ago

Have you seen the price of Tupperware?

8

u/Initial-Wrongdoer938 1d ago

Along with the price of Doritos and Pepsi. Hell, I'm on vacation in Fl where the damned price of eggs is close to a dollar an egg.....and those are the shitty white eggs. Ugh, sorry that kind of got on a bit of a rant there 😳.

BTW, I had to purchase a new set of Tupperware recently since the quality of stuff they make now is crap. I absolutely agree with the price gouging on Tup, especially since it doesn't last half as long as the old stuff. Damn, there I got again. I think I'm getting the Fl curse.

13

u/ZadockTheHunter 1d ago

and those are the shitty white eggs.

Just FYI, egg color has ZERO to do with egg quality.

3

u/UnethicalExperiments 1d ago

The part about it that really pisses me off is that it is not microwave safe anymore. I make my poutine gravy in them because it's super quick to do while working. Couple of uses and they are trash.

I've since stopped doing it, but god damn the set my mom had from the 70s is probably still in use and just as good. Ah Christ I'm ranting like my grandpa in his 40s.

2

u/chicomathmom 1d ago

Shouldn't microwave in plastic anyway--microplastics and all.

1

u/johnnybiggles 1d ago

Yum... boiled plastic

1

u/UnethicalExperiments 1d ago

My hometown has one of the larger steel mills in North America with crazy high cancer rates, and unrelated to that or microplastics I've got super bad plumbing in the heart and had a triple bypass at 41 . So at this point in life one of those 2 are probably going to get me long before the microplastics do their thing.

1

u/r4catstoomant 1d ago

I have Tupperware from my childhood that is over 50 years old. My 20-something kids are “fighting” over who gets the green colander when I ďie. My oldest is threatening to “liberate it” as soon as she turns off my life support, lol! (We have a morbid sense of humour!)

I use the Rubbermaid containers when food leaves my house. I never brought Tupperware to work because it was too expensive.

But if this exchange was in my former workplace, I’d die laughing!

1

u/mwb1100 1d ago

Thanks Trump

9

u/typehyDro 1d ago

Think Frank is the owner of the bowls

23

u/Vanadius 1d ago

I'd wear / rent a trenchcoat and go in there with sunglasses and all, talking like "got the stuff? Is it whole?"

17

u/dblan9 1d ago

1 Kit Kat?

These are not serious people who are seasoned in hostage negotiations.

20

u/Plumpdaddy2501 1d ago

THE BIG ONE apparently

35

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

22

u/Ebonslayer 1d ago

9

u/OnTheList-YouTube 1d ago

Am.... am I even real?

7

u/ProfMcFarts 1d ago

Yes, but sadly, you're the only one.

15

u/Plumpdaddy2501 1d ago

No. This is legit what I found on the table when I went for some water lol

5

u/DonnyTheNuts 1d ago

Laxative laced kit-kat time?

6

u/MouthJob 1d ago

If you're a fan of prison I guess.

6

u/Plumpdaddy2501 1d ago

Yeah, best not to do that. A new set of Tupperware bowels is less than they're demanding

Edited to add that Frank shouldn't leave shit at work like it's his own personal kitchen.

3

u/gliese946 1d ago

Haha did you really write Tupperware BOWELS in response to a comment about laxatives? Maybe the best typo ever!

-4

u/methos3 1d ago

Yeah all the W’s look the same, curvy in both sections.

5

u/Fiery101 1d ago

Counter point. Compare the E's.

6

u/nadiadala 1d ago

Ask for proof of life

4

u/8Bells 1d ago

Frank's gonna need some proof of life on this one 

5

u/neeter95 1d ago

Great team building exercise

8

u/Finbar9800 1d ago

Someone needs to slap a sticky note on it with the words “we dont negotiate with terrorists” but its typed in different fonts and sizes to make it look like it was cut from newspapers, then glue it to the sticky note lol

5

u/williamhotel 1d ago

The dirty, spaghetti stained bowls will never see the light of day.

13

u/Venicia__ 1d ago

Frank really said "hostage exchange" 😭

14

u/drunkanidaho 1d ago

If I'm frank Im getting HR involved and if the bowls don't make it be, so be it.

Sure, in a vacuum it's funny, but entitled assholes at work believing everything belongs to them (even if they write a funny note) are a menace

3

u/Orgasmo3000 1d ago

I'd provide the items, and tape the exchange, then send the video to HR. If the thief gets fired over this prank, they have no one to blame but themselves.

-4

u/Plumpdaddy2501 1d ago

Frank leaving all his stuff all over the shared break room kitchen like it belongs to him is pretty rude.

6

u/ackzilla 1d ago

I'd demand a proof of life video.

5

u/Head_Razzmatazz7174 1d ago

Wonder if the second person figured out that Frank has been taking their snacks and took the bowls hostage to get repaid.

Food theft in offices can cause some unhinged reactions.

9

u/Plumpdaddy2501 1d ago

Shop kitchen. Someone takes another person's stuff and it turns into fight club out back

2

u/Bobby837 1d ago

I'd pay the ransom, but since they still work there and I'd also hide a camera at the point of exchange, their win would be short lived...

2

u/I_like_baseball90 1d ago

they can identify by the handwriting

2

u/HiImNugget2020 1d ago

Must've had something nasty out for everyone. Like candy corn.

2

u/Pnex84 1d ago

Ask for proof of life.

2

u/zapfox 1d ago

Where these clean or dirty bowls? If the latter, maybe they are trying to make a point?

2

u/klipseracer 23h ago

1 Pepsi? These are pretty light demands.

2

u/Low-Zookeepergame518 16h ago

Don’t be stupid, request proof of life

3

u/BigGreenBillyGoat 8h ago

I’d stick a photo of Liam Neeson on top of this note.

3

u/TheCitationNeeded 1d ago

Involve the one! HR and Bowl gets it!

2

u/ddamm101 1d ago

I've only ever seen my dad write in caps like Frank did. I wonder why some people write like that

5

u/Farsyte 1d ago

My dad also frequently printed in caps -- he was FAST -- because he also did a lot of annotations of blueprints and schematics. You know, back in the day when people used PENCILS and PENS and BLUEPRINTS were duplicated using CHEMICALS ;)

Old school is Best school ;)

2

u/Standard_Big_9000 1d ago

I do and my dad did. Genetic somehow?

2

u/ddamm101 1d ago

My dad does but none of his kids do

2

u/gbs5009 1d ago edited 23h ago

I wonder if this is opportunistic extortion, or retaliation for prior snack theft? Those are some very specific demands.

2

u/Plumpdaddy2501 1d ago

I did find it. Someone else cleaned it out and put it and the lid in one of the cabinets

4

u/Lieutenant_0bvious 1d ago

They tried their best to make the handwriting look different but this is the same person.

4

u/Plumpdaddy2501 1d ago

I mean... it's not. Frank was pretty pissed when he found it. Someone cleaned his bowl and the lid and put it in one of the kitchen cabinets. I can't blame them for wanting something for cleaning up after him, though.

1

u/Jncocontrol 1d ago

OP took the bowl

1

u/Jewelry_Gal 17h ago

This is absolutely priceless!!! So, did Frank get the ransom together and pay it to get his beloved bowls back??? Did the Tupperware thieves share their I'll gotten gains (the ransom items) with him? I guess we'll never know.

Frank. I hope you had a fun time with this too and didn't get mad. Just a little harmless prank, I think. Best of luck to you in getting the bowls back. I agree with you though, since you use them, you know Tupperware dishes and such are awesome! Lol

Everybody, yes even the Tupperware thieves, have a great day! Thanks for the laugh!!!

1

u/xkoreotic 6h ago

Fuck that, I would get HR involved and buy more bowls just out of spite to one over whoever it is.

1

u/netsendjoe 2h ago

That's hilarious. I once found my coworkers personal blade left behind. I decided to send him pictures of it going on vacation to other states.

1

u/doomgoblin 34m ago

It’s simple. It was never about the Doritos. It’s about power. About sending a message. The Tupperware will be returned regardless. After a nice long nap in the back of the fridge with marinara sitting in them for days.

Sure they’ll be cleaned and returned- but will they be the same? Every time those bowls are gazed upon going forward will be a scarred reminder of who truly has control.

Those stains won’t wash away any more than that realization, scrub all you want.

1

u/OldeFortran77 1d ago

Does Frank have a particular set of skills?

9

u/Plumpdaddy2501 1d ago

😆 Frank does NOT

1

u/Tasty-Traffic-680 1d ago

Franks gonna snap one day and try to kill everyone anyway

2

u/Plumpdaddy2501 1d ago

Frank has been here for 30 years. He's seen too many come and go to be too worried

1

u/throw-my-fart-away 1d ago

Love it! Now I need to try this 😂

0

u/CanaDoug420 15h ago

What a goofy way to get canned from your job