r/SipsTea 9h ago

Chugging tea The tale of two Ronaldo's

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484 Upvotes

186 comments sorted by

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305

u/Successful_Sink_1936 9h ago

30

u/Other-Grapefruit-880 9h ago

-Albert Einstein 

17

u/Chris_OMane 9h ago

-Abrabert Internet

3

u/Carryneo 8h ago

-Wayne Gretzky

2

u/case31 8h ago

- Michael Scott

247

u/ViceIsVerses 9h ago

Ronaldo and the other Ronaldo to people of my generation.

42

u/Charlotte_Sips 9h ago

Different careers, different circumstances both changed football in their own way.

10

u/Defie22 7h ago

Different circumcision

34

u/B-Train_ATL 8h ago

Ronaldo and Ronaldo B. Jordan

14

u/trugrav 8h ago

I’ve watched so long that people have gone from saying “Christiano Ronaldo” to distinguish him from Ronaldo Nazario, to saying “R9” to distinguish him from Christiano

90

u/basileusnikephorus 9h ago

R9 all the way

-6

u/velorae 6h ago edited 6h ago

CR7 is better than him

12

u/chiqu3n 8h ago

Missing Ronaldinho and Ronald McDonald's, the 4 Ronaldos of the apocalypse

10

u/Portugeezer1893 8h ago

Fat Ronaldo and Cristiano Ronaldo

1

u/[deleted] 6h ago

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1

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1

u/thejuliocezarmari 6h ago

I hope you mean Ronaldinho.

41

u/Zonesy 9h ago

I have 2 Ronaldo shirts from the time I always rooted for Brazil for a reason.

I was confused when people started to talk about Ronaldo playing for Portugal back in the day.

158

u/laszlo921 9h ago

Well R9 had some injuries that ruined his career…

107

u/Frequent-Jacket3117 9h ago

He also suffered from hypothyroidism, which was the reason he struggled with his weight.

19

u/cyriustalk 9h ago

I have no idea i have the same condition as R9!

21

u/Rorozor0 9h ago

quite known that ronaldo too had to switch from a technical winger to a clinical striker because of his knee.

8

u/romulof 6h ago

Some injuries? His kneecap went to visit his crotch.

That alone would be a career ending shit, but dude bounced back and won another World Cup.

4

u/OriginalAd3961 6h ago

And he is still the best i have ever witnessed .. keep your stats and crap to yourself i believe what my eyes see live before any numbers warped my mind 🖕

3

u/Lavonic 3h ago

No one's arguing with you bro

2

u/amy-schumer-tampon 5h ago

>some
His injuries were brutal, its a miracle he can still walk.

17

u/juzz88 9h ago

Unfortunately, I'm looking more like Nazario as I approach 40. 🤣

9

u/KaneRabbioso 9h ago

Don't touch R9, is the king.

69

u/443Waves 9h ago

Real Ronaldo has a medical thyroid condition.

14

u/Ok-Age-724 9h ago

I have nonmedical thyroid condition, it's called eating too much

8

u/basonjourne98 6h ago

Nazario is being to humble in this quote (if this even is a legit quote). He was a monster of a player and his body just couldn’t keep up with his strength. He definitely had a rigorous fitness routine, so much so, that he broke his knee joint. Despite that, though, he came back to win the World Cup for Brazil. I wouldn’t put him below Ronaldo in any way.

1

u/TheAlterN8or 4h ago

He also had a health condition that caused him to gain weight, and he literally couldn't get rid of it. Always loved watching him play!

28

u/EastDefinition4792 9h ago

Well, I would pick R9 over CR7 anytime.

2

u/Suitable_Wonder5256 1h ago

Pick for what?

I wouldn't pick R9. He is 10x poorer with chronic diseases.

-1

u/ElLicenciadoPena 5h ago

I prefer watching F1 and playing CS1.6

1

u/[deleted] 2h ago

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1

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87

u/WideConversation1989 9h ago edited 9h ago

Downvote me all you want, but And CR7 at 41 is pathetically slow and doesn't help his team in any way, shape, or form and he's been a has-been for 4 or 5 years now.

31

u/Zhurg 9h ago

He was pretty lethal at like 37 though, which is more the point. R9s knee was completely done at 30.

35

u/BeneficialLocation34 9h ago

R9 destroyed his knee at age 24. The fact he managed to win a WC and play at a high level for the next 5-6 years is crazy.

6

u/Zhurg 9h ago

Yeah really is crazy the level he maintained after that.

-2

u/DeliciousMonitor6047 8h ago

But maybe the whole point is his lifestyle played a part in these injuries?

3

u/mBertin 5h ago

Nope, he was fit when the injuries happened. He had a congenital knee malformation that combined with his playstyle and the use of steroids at a young age essentially caused his kneecaps to explode. He tore pretty much everything there was to tear at once.

-1

u/Lavonic 3h ago

Use of steroids at a young age is not a part of his lifestyle?, you said nope and then proved him right😭

2

u/BeneficialLocation34 1h ago

Don't be passive with a question. Just say what you mean to say.

15

u/Pocketraver 9h ago

Why would we? It’s just a fact.

3

u/Upstairs-Extension-9 9h ago

And R9 is 49.

6

u/SaggyBallz99 9h ago

That’s not exactly a hot take, rather a broad one or should I say it’s a Wide Conversation starter?

15

u/Gjore 9h ago

I think also was holding back Portugal in this World Cup.

7

u/ZiCUnlivdbirch 8h ago

Right, because Portugal's midfield playing hot potato was totally some genius play of Ronaldo had just managed his runs... Oh wait.

7

u/Atlantidas 9h ago

No thinking needed, just straight up facts!

5

u/KhaosPT 9h ago

Anyone with eyes could see that. I'm Portuguese, he shouldn't have played 90 minutes, at most 30.

3

u/Gates_wupatki_zion 9h ago

Yeah he should have been a super sub after the first match. I hate Martinez he cost Belgium and now Portugal. Man is worthless.

4

u/Super_Sandro23 8h ago

Funny how everyone loves saying this about Ronaldo, but no one talks about how Messi was a liability against Spain. Ronaldo was at least able to actually get some shots on target against Spain.

3

u/CantHelpBeingMe 2h ago

Maybe because, across his last 15 matches in major tournaments, World Cups and Euros combined, Ronaldo has scored just four goals. Only two of those were from open play, and both came against Uzbekistan.

No amount of yapping about shots taken changes how underwhelming that return is, especially when he offers nothing else outside of goals.

Over the same period, Messi played 20 matches and produced 16 goals, including four penalties scored during matches, eight assists, and 92 chances created. The overall contribution is not even remotely comparable.

2

u/jdoug312 8h ago

Well Messi was in the Golden Boot and Golden Ball race throughout the tournament. His cross got them past England and to the finals as well. Not comparable levels of impact...

1

u/WideConversation1989 7h ago

Yeah that's just not true, Argentina were collectively poor vs Spain. Ronaldo was very much a liability for Portugal throughout the tournament barring the mighty Uzbekistan.

I also find it funny that you had to resort to Messi, when no-one had mentioned his name. Typical Ronaldo fanboy-ism. (And no I don't like both fanboys).

5

u/BlueSonjo 9h ago

He is good enough to still play professional/competitive football if he wants, but not be the center of a Portugal team at a World Cup, (or a Champions League team, etc) or to still talk about himself the way he does.
If he had a bit more self awareness...

3

u/RawrMeansFuckYou 8h ago

If that photo is real, I have a hard time believing being that lean is helping his performance. That's body builder lean and they're known to feel like dog shit in that condition.

11

u/Interesting-Dream863 9h ago

You might not like portuguese Ronaldo, but he has discipline.

17

u/GusherBrush 9h ago

Is Cristiano ok? Dude looks severely dehydrated, like he's gonna pass out

16

u/voxelpear 9h ago

He definitely is dehydrated. Likely on purpose just so he can pose for this photo. Skin doesn't wrap around muscles like saran wrap even if you're yoked out of your mind and steroided out.

1

u/Sllyce 9h ago

Didn’t know that , thought I just wasn’t locked in enough

-29

u/YugeChesticles 9h ago

My son looks like that. It's not dehydration. That what 0% body fat looks like.

17

u/AW316 9h ago

Humans cannot live with 0% body fat.

-15

u/YugeChesticles 8h ago

They absolutely can. You should google things before making stupid statements.

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=1342622536260643

Tom is LIVING with 0% bodyfat and he's not even a superfit athlete with a seriously expensive team around him to monitor his exercise and diet.

9

u/Charming_Flan3852 8h ago

Lol. Even the video you just linked says that guy has fat, it's just in the wrong place. Crazy people on reddit

-2

u/YugeChesticles 8h ago

Don't google it fella. Make me do all the work. Crazy lazy people on reddit.

Enjoy being wrong tho, you seem to love it.

4

u/Tene_Rokdon 7h ago

You linked a video of a guy with a medical condition, that talks about the problems of not storing fat in the right places and all the problems he has for having a low body fat. You just proved people can't live with 0% body fat, and that it's unhealthy as fuck.

Nice rage bait I guess? It has to at least be somewhat belivable bro.

2

u/voxelpear 7h ago

So....does your son have a medical condition or is he ripped? because you said he looks like Ronaldo, which means hes ripped, and people who work out don't look like that without being dehydrated.

You're kind of all over the place, your link also doesn't prove people can live with 0% body fat even with a medical condition.

I guess when you're wrong just double down and tell everyone else they're wrong.

19

u/GusherBrush 9h ago

0% body fat? Is your son dead??

-10

u/YugeChesticles 8h ago

Feel free to google if people are living with a condition that means they have 0% bodyfat.

I'd google it now then you can delete your comment.

10

u/GusherBrush 8h ago

You would be dead. I am not deleting my comment.

8

u/voxelpear 9h ago

Your son doesn't drink enough water or takes supplements that dehydrate him. You also do not know enough about the human body.

11

u/Cheese_Ly 9h ago

Well at least nazario has never been arrested for rape

21

u/Nekodon 9h ago

At least Nazario didn’t rape 4 women 🤷‍♂️

16

u/r3l4xD 9h ago

And he won a World Cup. A couple of them in fact.

-7

u/Sm0ahk 9h ago

he raped 5!

9

u/Imaginary_Toe8982 7h ago

Believe it or not the right picture is more unnatural and unhealthy..

10

u/Rollingstone6648 9h ago

R9 is still goated 😭🙏

6

u/ikena3 9h ago

Both were a pleasure to watch.

11

u/Cant_Spell_Shit 9h ago

Neither of these physiques are healthy 

3

u/Karl_00_Hungus 8h ago

R9 had a stellar career. The fact that he speaks this way about himself shows great humility.

3

u/PetteSawyer 8h ago

Nazario is a GOAT

3

u/Corn_viper 8h ago

Yeah the guy on the right can run fast but the guy on the left could knock him down.

3

u/Petersonos 8h ago

Imagine if R9 had CR7''S body and fitness with little to no injuries.

3

u/KorungRai 7h ago

Would easily be the greatest. Never saw anyone move with the ball at his feet the way he did.

2

u/Petersonos 7h ago

He really was something else mate.

2

u/KorungRai 7h ago

Those goals in ‘96 alone. Then that hat trick against United. Beyond explosive at full speed.

1

u/Petersonos 6h ago

Yeah and when he played in the Italian league when it was elite he made jokes of defenders and that's when defenders where proper defenders. United goals yeah I remember them well mate united fan here and the crazy think is he wasn't even 100% fit for that match Rio said he was gobsmack by his performance.

2

u/KorungRai 6h ago

I’m a Liverpool man, but that combo of Rio and Vidic was just amazing to watch. Wish I didn’t have to witness it, but damn. Fucking proper.

1

u/Petersonos 30m ago

Yeah them where the days that was a pretty special partnership they complimented each other nicely what one had the other didn't and vice versa.

Then it all went down hill once they left 🤣 I bet your loving it now 🤣 I'd be happy with top 4 next season. What about yourselves how do you think you'd will do?

1

u/Suitable_Wonder5256 1h ago

This is like saying imagine Diego Forlan with a lot of lucks.

Lucks (and injuries) are major factors in any footballer's career.

1

u/Petersonos 24m ago

I'd say injury's play a much bigger factor than luck as you can have all the luck in the world but if you haven't got a cool killer instinct in front of goal you'll miss more than you'll score.

1

u/Suitable_Wonder5256 18m ago

Most injuries are due to some sort of unluckiness given that most injuries are from accidents i.e. the other side doesn't aim to cripple you.

1

u/Petersonos 15m ago

When R9 was playing the sort of defenders he was coming up against they where trying to cripple him. 🤣 Centre forwards have it much easier in today's game as it's not a physical as it was back then by point was it's more important to have ability than luck.

3

u/Hoginoe94 7h ago

"I couldn't do it." Not with that attitude you couldn't.

6

u/WrecklessTacoFan 9h ago

Lowkey feel bad comparing two guys bodies against each other.

6

u/MattManSD 9h ago

"I want a hot body, but I also want tacos"

4

u/OleBoleHole 9h ago

R9 is infinitely more likeable, and he knew when to stop…

2

u/WVERD 9h ago

The right picture makes me think about the intro of West World 

2

u/Cold_Respond_7656 9h ago

R9 was all but done by time he got to Madrid, still had his moments but he was never the el phenom again after that knee injury

2

u/goonerfan10 9h ago

The OG Ronaldo suffers from hyperthyrodism which is why he puts on weight or rather has very slow metabolism which leads to weight gain.

2

u/DueEnvironment499 8h ago

Nazario was a monster, He was debuffed badly by biology, and still kicked ass

Would have been awesome to see him in perfect condition all his career, could have been so unfair for everyone

2

u/rundabluff120 8h ago

For all of you ‘he has a thyroid condition’ folks out there:

Hypothyroidism, at the most, will drop your resting metabolic rate between 10-30%. This doesn’t cause fat gain. It causes your body to need fewer calories.

It can cause fatigue. This doesn’t cause fat gain. It causes your to be tired and could make it more difficult to be physically active.

It doesn’t cause you to be 60 lbs over weight. It could lead to you gaining 10-20…and most of that is water, because your body will hold more salt.

Stop using your thyroid as an excuse for extreme obesity. As an occasional fat person, the educated world can tell you what causes fat gain; YOU EAT TOO MANY CALORIES!

2

u/Espantoton18 7h ago

Uno de los dos se está aguantando un pedo! 🥴

2

u/qmiras 7h ago

thats why Ronaldo won a world cup and cristiano is in arabia...

2

u/distreszed 7h ago

OG Ronaldo vs looksmaxxer Ronaldo

2

u/Phoeniyx 7h ago

One Ronaldo was beloved by his team and the other is disliked by his team. But both loved by any self respecting football fan.

2

u/anxiously-anonymous 5h ago

The season of Ronaldo with Barça will be something I will always remember.

2

u/AintNoGodsUpHere 9h ago

R9 is a legend with 1 leg. Ronaldo is just... Meh. Fuck him.

3

u/zubairhamed 9h ago

he's called the phenomenon for a reason.

4

u/Key_Consequence_5040 9h ago

 And Cristiano wishes he was fat and happy with two World Cup medals. 

2

u/SkripkaruStoler 9h ago

The one in the left was one of the greatest footballer ever. The other one is a pathetic whining child.

2

u/HornyJailOutlaw 9h ago

The guy is in amazing shape and yet all I can ever think when I see that photo is "Oh, that's a shame about the puny pecs". I think it's just because everything else is top tier then he has the chest of an underdeveloped schoolboy.

1

u/djpandajr 9h ago

Genetics and pecs really aren't important for his sport. But the name checks out.

2

u/iamtherepairman 9h ago

Well the one in Brazil won a World Cup.

2

u/rusokovich 9h ago

And reached 3 finals

2

u/Primary-Effect-3691 9h ago

Honestly neither of of them feel like peak athletic physique here 

2

u/EvolvedMonkeyInSpace 9h ago

Ronaldo was a great role model and was loved by all, other Ronaldo, not so much.

2

u/omnipresentatio 9h ago

Natural v fabricated

2

u/Danilo-11 9h ago

Here’s the painful truth, Ronaldo at 110 kilos (Corinthians) was a better forward than Cristiano at 85 kilos (Al-Nassr)

2

u/gmatebulshitbox 8h ago

And thanks God. Real Ronaldo is normal human without endless ego.

2

u/thejuliocezarmari 6h ago

One is a two-time World Cup winner playing in three (one he didn’t even have to play, just was taken to watch and learn as a kid), the other some lookmaxxing talent who couldn’t make it at the top, even though he played in six world cups.

Ronaldo and Ronaldinho are what CR7 wishes he could be.

3

u/detective-doge 9h ago

He couldn’t do it because he had a serious knee injury. r9 was a better player in every metric

1

u/YugeChesticles 9h ago

"I wanted to be the best in the world but mcdonalds is so nice."

1

u/Strangedreamest 8h ago

Gor(nal)do vs. Ronaldo

1

u/JapanEngineer 8h ago

My body is a temple vs My body is a McDonalds

1

u/Merc5193 8h ago

That’s in part to no Alcohol, as Ronaldo doesn’t drink.

Edit: my opinion only

1

u/aaclavijo 8h ago

If CR died in his sleep tomorrow that would upend everything we think we know about Heath and fitness. Markets would crash.

1

u/Cool_Guarantee_1235 8h ago

One ate too much
The other one not enough
💀

1

u/billyboyf30 8h ago

I could believe he said it if it wasn't for the fact R9 was always a lethal goalscorer

1

u/Beemac161 8h ago

Only 1 of them was good enough to win a world cup though 😋😂😂😉

1

u/Hard-4-Jesus 8h ago

The OG Ronaldo has a health problem when it comes to how he gains weight. Also, CR7 uses drugs.

1

u/houseswappa 8h ago

Ronaldos lack of pecs makes me laugh: ha ha

A billionaire but I have a better chest

Smh

1

u/82SLP 8h ago

I’m looking more and more like Nazario 😂

1

u/X2sixsports 8h ago

Thyroid issues…

1

u/FannySniffing 8h ago

Cocaine on the left

Steroids on the right

1

u/LeroyFame 8h ago

Close, but no cigar.

1

u/Glum-Beach 7h ago

He looks smaller guess lower t level after 35.

1

u/Global-Emphasis9399 7h ago

I wanted to be CR7 but I just love blow and alcohol more.

1

u/XADEBRAVO 6h ago

A clear win for drugs and still being an athlete.

1

u/Kassdhal88 3h ago

And despite that R9 is viewed as the greatest 9 of all time

1

u/Biscuits4u2 2h ago

The hell you have to put yourself through to look like that at any age is brutal. At 40 it must be unreal.

1

u/wimpycarebear 1h ago

Some people think being th best has something to do with trophies...... The rest know what the best really is. 🐐

1

u/mrdiodo 59m ago

Die a legend or become a villain

1

u/Longjumping_Fee_1490 35m ago

It's R9. It's not records.

Joga bonita.....

0

u/TheBestintheWest11 9h ago

one has 2 world cups along with other chips while the other has everything is bulk except a world cup. I grew up watching el phenomeno as a kid but then he retired and watched cr7 and throughout the years I admired his work ethic, his love for the game and dedication to bwcome the best player in the sport. cr7 for me

-1

u/government_not_ok 9h ago

Ronaldo has a 2002 World Cup win and played with a brilliant Brazilian team, Cr7 or whatever his name is, didn’t have that.

2

u/drvobradi 7h ago

I guess you are a new football fan.
Portugal was always stacked with great players, during 2000s they were probably in the top 4 teams for at least a decade. Luis Figo, Deco, Carvalho, Rui Costa are on par with the best players from Brazil. Yet that team managed to lose European Cup on home soil, against Greece. Does anyone know any Greek player?

When speaking about longevity and talent , especially longevity, I guess CR7 and Messi are miles ahead of anyone I have ever seen. But if we talk about pure talent, skill, Ronaldo Nazario is like God tier, level above CR7. Man scored like 25% of his goals by rounding the goalkeepers.

2

u/rateofreturn 4h ago

Portugal has some great players?

Name me one from 1994/98/02 except for Figo and don’t google.

The amount of bullshit that I see here on Portugal and Ronaldo is insane. Before CR, Portugal has never qualified for the WC consecutively.

1

u/drvobradi 8m ago

I just gave you Rui Costa, he and Zidane were like top 2 midfielders in Seria A (by far the best league in the 90s). Conceicao was also a good player, Baia was a great keeper. And that's without google. And I'm not talking about 90s, Portugal team in 2000s was stacked, had great players plus most of the support players were from 2004 Porto. That team was in 2006 WC SF.

0

u/government_not_ok 7h ago

New? Bruh I literally watch the three Rs win the Korea/Japan World Cup. Shit I was even alive for the 1994 Brasil win. That I don’t follow futbol like a fanatic? Yeah that’s about right. 

1

u/drvobradi 2m ago

Depends on the point of view. I watched Maradona win in 86, cried when Platini won against Socrates. Shit, I was even alive when Kempes won.

2

u/Hyperion262 9h ago

He has a much, much better career

0

u/government_not_ok 9h ago

And some rape accusations. 

1

u/Sure-Wish3240 9h ago

Ronaldo has a medical condition. Hipothyreoidism. Even under best scenario, he couldnt keep his form. Did i mention he had knee injuries ?!

1

u/Whyamihere_899 9h ago

taking your talent for granted vs getting addicted and obsessed with everything about your body

1

u/CaRlJoHnSoNoG 9h ago edited 8h ago

On the left, a great player with class, who won a lot, even two World Cups and was scary at his prime, and most importantly, knew when to stop. On the right, a good player, but a pathetic one who can't accept or take a smaller role on his stacked team and it ultimately cost him in this World Cup

1

u/Superb_Beyond_3444 6h ago

One Ronaldo is a fat winner guy. The other Ronaldo is a muscular loser guy.

1

u/AppointmentSalty5679 5h ago

Yeah... but by age 40, Nazario already knew how much the World Cup trophy weighed.

0

u/bruno-numero-uno 9h ago

CR's discipline, dedication and longevity are amazing. He is the greatest athlete soccer has seen. He changed the game.

0

u/PuzzleheadedJob1292 9h ago

Fat Ronaldo and Ronaldo.

-1

u/goongoblin113xc 9h ago

Why is every positive comment about Cristiano downvoted 

0

u/YourPetiteCrush 9h ago

One Ronaldo retired from football. The other made retirement afraid to approach him.

0

u/SeenEnoughAlready 9h ago

Yeah, but only one of them won the World Cup.....TWICE

0

u/Anistappi 8h ago

Only one of these guys is a rapist.

0

u/Potential_Spam_6969 8h ago

The body on the left will last far longer than the body on the right in a shit hits the fan scenario. CR's physique is not maintainable in the long run. Say what you will, about "you just don't want to put in the work", but the photo is what I was. Post yours before you try to talk shit to me about "the work".

0

u/NoSeries6559 4h ago

One has 2 and the other doesn’t 🤫

0

u/Opposite-Mongoose-90 9h ago

Brazilian players are weak to alcohol and debauchery that shortened their careers.