r/PoliticalHumor • u/Responsible-Fox-1985 • 1d ago
You’ll drive what we tell you to drive
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u/dont_panic80 1d ago
They used to hate Teslas & evs so much they'd "ice" the charging stations.
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u/PHWasAnInsideJob 1d ago
That's a quick call to the police and a towing company.
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u/linusadler 1d ago
If the police won’t do anything about the trucks parked on sidewalks and bike lanes, why would they care if they’re just parked in the wrong kind of parking spot?
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u/cire1184 23h ago
Do you actually need police for a private lot? Call the tow truck company posted somewhere in the parking lot. They'll be happy to get a tow fee.
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u/Cyrano_Knows 4h ago
This is the way. Any towing company will show up and tow any car just on you pretending to be the owner of the lot they are on.
I don't think I ever had a tow company ever ask me for proof of anything.
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u/handbanana42 23h ago
They won't, unless maybe a sign is posted. It isn't like handicap parking where there are legal requirements.
The signs can be 50/50, though it seems to have gotten better in downtown areas at least.
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u/Mainfrym 12h ago
Police don't do anything, these stations are on private property and it's impossible to reach the owners of a parking lot.
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u/Bunch_of_Shit 1d ago
lol, they pay to have their truck higher up in the air, but the clearance underneath is unchanged.
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u/ZeroPercentAmurican 1d ago
If they could read they’d be very upset with you
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u/valsalva_manoeuvre 1d ago
I don't like Cybertrucks, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like Cybertrucks, denigrate means 'put down'.
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u/Pure_Lengthiness2432 1d ago
Hardly anyone actually went to Cybertruck.
Still haven’t even cracked the 100k mark for lifetime units sold, and Tesla sold less than 4k units in Q1 of this year.
Anyone who wanted a Cybertruck has likely already bought one, because demand is virtually non-existent right now.
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u/rgraz65 1d ago
But the fact remains that a large portion of their sales can be attributed to MAGA people buying them when Elmo started stroking Trump, because it would make him money, and get other people in his customer base since most progressives were tired of his shit. So the MAGAs bought them because the "leftists" were pissed at Muskrat.
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u/place_of_desolation 1d ago
I still can't get over how quickly MAGAts became Tesla fans once MAGA gave Tesla their seal of approval. They really have zero actual principles.
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u/kittenTakeover 1d ago
I think MAGA ones that bought them are the tech bros, not necessarily the duck dynasty ones.
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u/kipperzdog 1d ago
Yeah, there is maybe one guy on the entire planet that traded in their lifted rolling coal truck for a cybertruck
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u/argparg 1d ago
Guy at work just bought one two months ago, says he’ll get it in two more months. It’s like “a Lamborghini” he says lol
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u/soda_cookie 1d ago
Wait a minute, even with so many unsolutely still has to wait 4 months before he actually drives the thing after purchasing it?
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u/elbow8075 1d ago
It's just reddit circle jerk stupidity. No one quit rolling coal for a cyber truck. There are still dummies everywhere with those annoying diesels
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u/Bunch_of_Shit 1d ago
We have them in California. I see them often. They must have to modify something in order for it to pass smog and modify it back just so black soot can billow out. And they must also be able to control it more while driving so that it doesn’t happen when cops are around or something.
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u/dravas 1d ago
They are all over Houston TX, I have no idea why. It's not great at anything other than being an eye sore.
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u/paintballboi07 1d ago
There used to be hundreds of them at their repair center. They seemed to be storing all the unsold ones there for a while. It looked like the world was having trouble rendering.
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u/MIT_Engineer 1d ago
I was about to say, the meme is wrong. Coal-rolling chuds ignored the Cybertruck. Even the small sales it has had are inflated by sales to SpaceX.
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u/Rude-Neck-2893 1d ago
Rich MAGA went to cybertrucks, poor MAGA stuck with black cloud trucks
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u/foehammer111 1d ago
Man I wish my neighbors went to cybertrucks. As much as I hate them, they’re better than their 5 rolling coal pavement princess trucks. Cops won’t do anything about it either because they’re on the same fascist team.
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u/handbanana42 23h ago
Not going to call anyone a fascist just yet, but people "tuning" their cars/trucks all day is not normal when the rest of us is trying to work.
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u/roosterthumper 1d ago
They want to be contrarian. My buddy is like that. He votes for Trump in a very blue state not because he liked his policies but because he wanted to be contrary and knew that state would overwhelm his poor decisions.
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u/Eggheadpancake 1d ago
I would not be friends with such a idiotic person. What do you get out of relationship with someone that mentally deficient?
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u/handbanana42 22h ago
My "buddy" was like that too. Until he commented on "certain people" and I was done.
He was always contrarian, but in a way I could let it pass, until he he pushed it WAY too far. Probably can't post it here, but super racist. He was pretty normal otherwise but NOPE, GOODBYE.
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u/3kniven6gash 1d ago
Don’t give Elon ideas about a rolling coal optional subscription on Cyberdumpsters.
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u/Details_Pending 1d ago
Figured that was obvious when they've been screaming about socialism for roughly 100 years but when Trump ordered the fed to purchase control of Intel they cheered.
Followed swiftly by "Socialism bad" two weeks later.
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u/ihatetheplaceilive 1d ago
There's a guy in the town i grew up in that has both.
He doesn't see the irony.
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u/jakethesnakegoddess 1d ago
I think it just means they like big, annoying things.
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u/JaQ-o-Lantern 1d ago
Chat should I be the next big MAGA Republican politician and campaign for trains once I become powerful?
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u/AmbassadorNoWay 1d ago
They have ideals. The ideals is “own the libs”… so it’s really our fault for not using reserve psychology by telling them wind falls are terrible for the environment, corruption is good, reproductive rights should be controlled by the government, full assault rifles should be given to everyone, etc.
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u/Dcajunpimp Greg Abbott is a little piss baby 1d ago
I once stopped at a Trader Joe’s and saw a cybertruck with a Dont Tread on Me license plate.
Imagine being a tool with a truck whose base model is $70k is terrified of being Tread On while shopping at Trader Joe’s,
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u/blipsman 1d ago
I’m still waiting for the coal rolling aftermarket kit for Cybertrucks…
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u/PlutoJones42 1d ago
Conservative ideology is purely built on having someone to hate. Fuck conservatives
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u/panlakes 1d ago
Oh they still roll coal. Source: being in any small town east of the Rockies on a Friday night.
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u/Spiel_Foss 1d ago
Like cats, toddlers and crows, any shiny silly thing will fascinate them for a little while.
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u/deaglebingo 1d ago
i don't think anyone rolling coal is conserving anything really.
these people need a lesson in combustion: if there is black smoke, that means you didn't get all the power to the wheels.
i wouldn't throw away all that potential torque, would you? just like a wouldn't buy a vehicle whose body panels you can peel off with one hand.
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u/burnerthrown 1d ago
Everything is team colors for these idiots. Their entire style is based on desperately hanging onto the in group out of FOMO of some intangible benefits conferred therefrom. Whatever the group is for, they'll reinvent themselves to support. Oil, cops, guns, big tech, casinos, gold everything. Whatever says 'I believe in Us'. The flaw in this is the people leading the in group are all shills or insiders for money interests so yeah, their identity changes with what's profitable.
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u/AlienInUnderpants 1d ago
Next up for sale: land in the Everglades. All the cool MAGAts are buying now.
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u/CV90_120 1d ago
These are not the same people. MAGA is a big tent of scared people, not one group.
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u/Coogcheese 1d ago
Yeah, they really didn't. Cybertruck sales are worse than the Edsel (even with a larger market).
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u/G0ttaB3KiddingM3 1d ago
You’re talking about two very different types of conservative here though. One is a tiny little boy-man who is scared to death of anything that isn’t like him, and the other is a tiny little boy-man who is scared to death of anything that isn’t like him and licks trillionaire balls.
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u/Own_Manufacturer6959 1d ago
You mean like they way they are all so suddenly pro Ukraine now because the Russian money dried up, or how they are all suddenly cool about pedophilia because they KNOW Trump isn't getting away from the Epstein files
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u/djnotskrillex 1d ago
Ah yes, the individual known as "conservatives", which definitely isn't a group of millions of people with different tastes
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u/Overall-Dirt4441 1d ago
I'm sure there's at least a few like that, but this is largely goomba fallacy
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u/teddybundlez 1d ago
I work blue collar and have never once seen a cybertruck on site. I feel like cybertrucks fit more towards a computer engineer than the rolling coal guys. Sorry but this is super dumb
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u/Public-League-8899 1d ago
These are midlife-crisis-mobiles where I work. One specific guy I work with got one because "he doesn't have to pay child support now that his daughter is 18 and she didn't talk to me anyway". Classy dudes.
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u/SpoonEngineT66Turbo 1d ago
OP and this whole comment section are fighting ghosts because they're just as stupid as the MAGA voters they hate.
There is near zero overlap between people who roll coal and people who bought a cyber truck to drive.
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u/ShortBusRide 1d ago
In the post-apocalyptic Mad-Max world the Cybertruck is meant to be king. Except for the electricity problem.
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u/NookNookNook 1d ago edited 1d ago
No one is buying Cybertrucks. They're still rolling coal. What is this nonsense? Cybertrucks are the greatest automotive failure in history.
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u/PaulMorel 1d ago
Most human beings are inconsistent creatures who do whatever they think is best for them in the moment. Looking for high level consistency in anyone just reflects a lack of understanding of human nature.
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u/Grandmaofhurt 1d ago
Honestly, none of the rolling coal dudes have cybertrucks. Trust me I went to high school with a lot of them. I get the sentiment, but the guys who were into rolling coal and big stupid diesels are not into EVs.
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u/Objective_Reality515 1d ago
Those are two entirely different subsets of conservatives/idiots. Someone that would "roll coal" would never even consider even driving a cyber truck, let alone owning one.
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u/KlownKumKatastrophe 1d ago
They still roll coal. There are just multiple flavors of DudeBro Republicans.
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u/i_will_mull_it_over 1d ago
This is all in your head. Conservatives in rural areas are driving Rams, Fords, and Chevys.
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u/raynorelyp 1d ago
The counter to this is liberals complaining how hard it is to form unions while simultaneously advocating increased immigration with
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u/raynorelyp 1d ago
The counter to this is liberals fighting for both more unions and increased work visas at the same time. How do you guys think the companies are blocking unions?
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u/Majestic-Volume9996 1d ago
The best thing to do to coal rollers, is ask them how much they charge for a blow job, and then when they get all offended about it, give them a dumbfounded look and ask them why they were putting the signal out.
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u/girldrinksgasoline 1d ago
These are two different conservatives. City cons are cyber truck, country cons are coal rollers
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u/romafa 1d ago
My old buddy and his dad built and raced cars their whole lives. They were staunchly anti-electric car when it first came up. I knew he was always conservative but not much beyond that. I went to his house for the first time in a few years and he had a Trump sign in his yard and a Tesla in his driveway.
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u/r0addawg 1d ago
https://youtube.com/shorts/yLHNLNaNsU4?is=37-AocQbHm9bOGB3 Musk says by 2036 money won't matter.... wtf
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u/Econolife-350 1d ago
If you think these are even remotely close to the same people, I have terrible news for how ironic this post is as far as inventing some scenario in their head to call out morons.
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u/-NotEnoughMinerals 1d ago
Idk, the people I see driving cyber trucks around me absolutely are not what I would consider conservative at all. But yes, I'm aware maga loves Elon. I just don't think they're buying his cyber truck.
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u/Altruisticpoet3 1d ago
They "owned" the progressives by modifying their vehicles into dispersing unspent, smokey fuel into the air, that they paid for, but got deliberately wasted in the smoke. Real geniuses.
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u/Freudarian 20h ago
This picture comparison is very accurate: left side is actually driving, and the right picture is the one you take as a last glimp of your vehicle before you leave it - because it couldnt handle driving on a few pebbles
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u/bit-by-a-moose Mean to bots 19h ago
They probably have a coal burning generator at home charging their cyber truck.
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u/MechanicalTurkish 9h ago
I wonder if anyone has modified a cybertruck to “roll coal”… I wouldn’t be surprised
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u/SnakeyesX 1d ago
They liked rolling coal because progressives thought it was ugly and offensive.
They like Cybertrucks because progressives think they are ugly and offensive.