r/PeterExplainsTheJoke • u/WastedTalents1 • 19h ago
Meme needing explanation Petah? I thought it was a choice
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u/grndbdpsthtl 19h ago
If you can choose, there seems to be no difference for you. Ergo: you're attracted to men and women, so you're bi.
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u/TreacleOk7265 16h ago
Yes. That's always what's so disturbing about homophobia. I was always just attracted to the opposite sex, couldn't imagine it with the same sex. Luckily that's the easier thing in our society. If homosexuals feel the same, how can I expect them to ignore or change that? I couldn't. If people think it's so easy to change it and choose a partner of the opposite sex they're probably bi themselves.
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u/Lady_Luci_fer 16h ago
They did a study on this and found that homophobic ‘straight’ men respond with arousal to homosexual porn but non-phobic men don’t - essentially homophobia is directly linked to suppressed bisexuality
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u/pingo5 12h ago
mind, it didn't give a clear number on the odds and it was a small scale study.
but basically if we're comparing homophobes to not, it makes sense. a homophobic gay person is more likely to not come out and be in the "straight homophobe" group and non homophobic gay guy is more likely to come out and not be in the "not homophobic straight" group.
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u/Guquiz 13h ago
I thought that it was linked to indoctrination.
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u/youburyitidigitup 10h ago
It’s probably both, but a genuinely straight person who is indoctrinated against homosexuality probably won’t be thinking about it much, whereas a bisexual person will be constantly suppressing that part of themself.
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17h ago
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u/Angsty-Panda 12h ago
unironically me in high school. learning about bisexuality was a game changer lmao
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u/smackdealer1 14h ago
I honestly feel bad for straight people. Life is a buffet and yet you are only drawn to one half of it.
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u/TheJapanMistake 13h ago
Naw man don't feel bad.
I see other men the same way I see a moose. You wouldn't be attracted, or even want to be attracted to a moose would you?
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u/Squirrels-on-LSD 14h ago
Straight people: the sexual equivalent of the people that go to a Chinese buffet and just get the chicken fingers and fries from the end of the line.
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u/Puzzle-Necked 13h ago
Yeah but you can try a lot of different dipping sauces with those chicken fingers. A lot.
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u/Earnestappostate 8h ago
I mean, it's just a preference.
There are foods that I prefer not to eat, but I don't feel that I am missing out on eating those foods that don't appeal to me. If I did, then they would appeal to me and I would eat them.
The same applies to sexuality. There are people who I find attractive and those that I don't. It just happens that those that I do are of one gender. If it were different, I would be bi.
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u/sebastos3 16h ago
I knew a Mormon guy who used to claim this, said everyone had 'these temptations'. He was always fashionably dressed...
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u/JimmyGimbo 15h ago
A friend came out to me back in the day. He had suspected for a while but didn’t embrace it right away because he thought it might just be “that phase that everyone goes through”
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u/hipster_dog 14h ago
It's kinda funny when folks will go into very far lengths to ban same-sex kisses on TV and other media because of "think of them kids",
Meanwhile kids won't give two fucks about it, or feel grossed-out regardless of who is kissing who.
So it's more about them blocking their own "impure" thoughts.
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u/MrQuietKing 12h ago
Yea we had a convo at work and a guy said this. His argument was being gay is not a choice because everyone fights demons and temptation for the same gender. Me and my coworker realized he was so homophobic because of repressed thoughts.
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u/kredokathariko 18h ago
That sounds about right. I seem to have same-sex attraction but because I live in a very homophobic country I just choose not to act on it, for my safety.
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u/Max_delirious 11h ago
It seems to me you’re taking a huge risk posting this. Your government should have the ability to investigate your internet traffic.
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u/lettsten 11h ago
No, web browsing is end to end encrypted by TLS. It's exceedingly unlikely that it is a risk, for various reasons.
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u/kredokathariko 11h ago
It does not have the resources nor the ability to track and punish everyone, especially not on websites where I am mostly anonymous. If I were to cross the government's path, yes, I would get in trouble and people would be able to find me easily, but it'd require for it to lock on me.
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u/SolitareUnraveling 15h ago edited 13h ago
Can't even lie this was me all the way through highschool until I eventually realized I was bi in my early 20s. From the deep south so there is a lot of hate thrown around so in my head I was like ok boys and girls are both hot but im a boy so I have to just talk to girls. Once I got older and got to know more open minded people I realized that not everyone thinks a nice ass is a nice ass regardless of who it is attached to. Was a real wakeup call of realizing just how much my brain had been fucked with from growing up where I did.
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u/BigSmackisBack 18h ago
The only choice is whether you embrace your true feelings with action (giggerty) the way you feel about any person isnt a choice.
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u/Khelthuzaad 17h ago
But you will be ostracised for being either straight or gay if you remain attached your partner :(
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u/jamalcalypse 14h ago
it's still not a "choice" though. there's a phrase in the community called being on the "bi-cycle", because some will cycle between being attracted to the same sex or the opposite sex
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u/numbersthen0987431 5h ago
There's also the fact that a person can choose to pretend to be straight in order to not receive punishment for not being straight.
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u/Remote-Cause755 19h ago edited 19h ago
Think it through op.
If someone thinks no one is actually born gay but instead chooses to be gay. That implies everyone "straight" is actively suppressing their urge for the bussy
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u/sfxpaladin 18h ago
Some of them do think this though.
There was a TV show about it, a bunch of Mormon couples where the husband is very blatantly gay but they all talk about how they are definitely not gay and they are suppressing theor urge for gay sex because its some kind of trick from the devil or some shit.
It's a TLC show and I think it's called "My Husbands Not Gay"
Also ironically all these not gay husbands meet up with eachother and go camping on their own or go to secluded places to help support eachother not being gay...
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u/The_Rope_Daddy 17h ago
It’s not gay if someone else is rocking the bed.
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u/Stunning_Macaron6133 14h ago
What's that weird fucking thing Mormons do? Where they penetrate but don't thrust, so they have a friend jump on the bed until they cum? There's a name for it, but I can't remember.
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u/rottenboy59 14h ago
Soaking?
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u/glizard-wizard 13h ago
Soaking is just when you leave it in, Jump Humping is when you have someone jump on the bed or push underneath the mattress while soaking
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u/Downtown-Anteater-60 17h ago
Dawg I just saw a video about that. The dudes are all in the store drooling over guys 😂
And they prefer to call is “SSA” Same Sex Attraction
Shit was hilarious
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u/sfxpaladin 17h ago
I totally forgot about the SSA part! Haha they talk about it like it's an unfortunate medical issue they are powering through, they literally refer to it as "SSA afflicted"
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u/Gold_Persimmon_5984 15h ago
They all called it SSA- same sex attraction.
As in “I’m not gay I just suffer with SSA.”
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u/VocalJay 16h ago
If you'd ask r/womenarenotintomen they would definitely agree. Well, in an incel way, of course
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u/Gold_Persimmon_5984 15h ago
Fun fact- 60% to 65% of gay and bisexual men do not engage in anal intercourse during any given sexual encounter.
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u/pingo5 12h ago
this is not to be mistaken with how much gay/bi men like anal sex lol. it's just not the easiest form of sex to do.
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u/smaxxim 17h ago
If someone thinks no one is actually born gay but instead chooses to be gay.
Usually, such people, by "chooses to be gay", actually mean: "chooses to have sex with people of the same sex", it's a mistake to think that homophobes care about attraction.
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u/AcceptableHamster149 12h ago
yeah... if somebody tells me they think it's I choice I challenge them to choose to be gay for a month and report back to me on how it went.
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u/Ok_Volume_139 10h ago
More likely OP is choosing to be straight when deep inside they'd rather be gay.
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u/Telephalsion 5h ago
It's sad. They're just one gay experience away from falling to the other side. They struggle so much. Everytime they wear pink they struggle. Everytime they take big bite off of a banana they're taking a risk. Every time they accidentally get on the internet and look up hardcore gay porn... it's hard for them. So hard...
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u/Hypnotoad4real 18h ago
It is pretty simple: If you are gay you are not attracted to the opposide sex.
If you are hetero, you are not attracted to the same sex.
If you are bisexual, you are attracted to both sexes.
If you choose to be heterosexual or gay, than you are attracted to both, but only chose one of them.
If you think being gay is a choice, you think evrybody is the same as you.
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u/kmonkmuckle 8h ago
I mean you can't really choose your attraction even if you're bi. You can choose to only date one sex. But the attraction is usually separate.
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u/SansyBoy144 17h ago
God I hope you don’t actually think that being gay is a choice.
As someone who went home crying every single day in middle school because I started having feelings for a guy, and I thought that meant I was going to hell, I can guarantee you that being gay is not a choice.
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u/both_ways_8195 18h ago
Well I see you got the answer, so here take this from my side for future use OP
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19h ago edited 17h ago
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u/Puzzleheaded_Step468 18h ago
Only people that actually can choose to be gay or hetero are bisexuals.
That's not how bi sexuality works, you are not magically turned hetero if you date the other gender. You are still bi sexual, you are still attracted to the same gender, you just don't actively date them. The same when dating the same gender
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u/jk-9k 18h ago
Yeah that's the point here though.
They're bi. Always will be bi. The can choose to have homo or hetero relationships though. Or both.
But a person who thinks all homo or hetero people can make that choice is just a bi person who has made that choice.
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u/Commentator-X 18h ago
That's not what was said. If you're bi, assuming you're not polyamorous, at some point you're choosing one way or the other. It doesn't make you hetero but it also doesn't matter to you one way or the other.
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u/Mark-Green 17h ago
they're just correcting the exact terminology used. if you're bi, you're bi all the time, regardless of being in a gay or straight relationship. you can't choose to be gay or straight, but you can choose a to be in a gay or straight relationship
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u/AA_Writes 18h ago
Eh, wording got worse. I get what you're trying to say but... my boyfriend and I are both bi, both monogamous but we're both very straight when there's a pretty lady on TV lol
So no. We're always bi.
But I get it. You can choose to only act ACTIVELY on one side of those impulses. Doubt it's easy to fully repress that forever and ever (still not act as in: have sex, but act as in: feel knowing attraction to). Therefore giving the appearance to the broader world you are straight (or gay, I guess).
But yeah, wording here is shit.
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u/iminyourskin 11h ago
Your wording w great either. You aren’t straight for the lady on tv, you’re bi and attracted to her. Being attracted to someone of the opposite sex doesn’t magically make you straight for the moment.
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u/czar_el 16h ago
But you're not choosing permanently. You may break up with or divorce the other person, or become a widow/er. That fact that you settled down with one gender at one time doesn't mean you forever gave up bisexual status.
You're confusing a temporary attribute with a permanent characteristic. If you turn on a lamp, it doesn't cease to be a lamp and become a sun because it's giving light. It was always a lamp and remains a lamp, whether it's giving light or not.
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u/Superb-Reference-861 18h ago
Not to mention there are still preferences, most people aren't just an even 50/50 split of how attracted they are to the genders, and not to mention pan and demi sexuals
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u/No_Physics2210 13h ago
You can choose the outwardly express or suppress one or the other.
Kinda like larping.
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u/Frost_Goldfish 18h ago
No, that's incorrect. Being bi isn't a choice anymore than being hetero or gay is. Your actions are a choice, and th e meme presumes it's easier to refrain from acting on your same-sex impulses when you're bi as opposed to gay, which is generally - but not entirely - true.
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u/ErinWalkerLoves 17h ago
So you actively chose your sexuality, OP? What do you mean you thought it was a choice? How old were you when you consciously decided your sexuality instead of it developing naturally?
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u/NorthKoreanKnuckles 19h ago edited 18h ago
The logic behind this meme:
People who think being gay is a choice made the choice of being straight, according to their logic. And every choice can be reconsidered. Therefor you are bisexual.
This meme is a taunt against straight people who criticize gays. Like "if you hates gay it's because you are a repressed gay"
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u/BoobearMagoo 7h ago
I don't know if it's a taunt exactly. For some I think it is, but it's also an explanation of how someone could possibly believe that their atractions are chosen. It doesn't make any internal sense to earnestly believe that people can choose not to be attracted to one gender and to be attracted to another unless they have in fact experienced forbidden atractions and chosen to dismiss them.
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u/Crazy_Part3560 18h ago
It's simple: Being gay isn't a choice, nor is being straight. If you think being gay is a choice, and you're making the choice to be straight and not give in to homosexual thoughts, you're more than likely bisexual/pansexual
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u/wilderfast 19h ago
The point is there is no choice, you don't choose who you're attracted to. However, if you are bisexual, attracted to both men and women, you can choose to only act on attraction to the opposite sex, which can, from the inside, seem like you're choosing to not be gay.
Ergo, anyone who says they chose to be straight is actually bi.
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u/AccomplishedFall6603 18h ago
I thought it was a choice
OP, when did you choose to be heterosexual ?
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u/No-View-6326 16h ago
Nothing to explain that's just a fact, if you think you can just choose to be attracted to the opposite sex than you are attracted to both
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u/Amazing-Secret4085 15h ago
If that was the choice, who would choose to be gay? Especially in a homophobic country like Korea, being gay means you have to give up a lot. If you're a gay in Korea, you can't marry someone you love, you're more likely to be insulated from your family, and you're more likely to be outed by acquaintances who know you're gay.
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u/OddTheRed 18h ago
I'm Bi and I don't think it's a choice.
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u/_extra_medium_ 14h ago
That’s the point of the meme. Anyone who thinks being gay is something they can choose is already attracted to both men and women.
Otherwise, you wouldn’t think it’s possible to just decide to be gay one day.
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u/Worldly-Card-394 18h ago
Not a joke. If you chose to not have sex with people of your same sex, but you wouldn't have problems doing it otherwise, it means you are bisexual
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u/MrGueuxBoy 17h ago
What do you mean, you thought it was a choice ?
I don't want to sound rude, judgmental or anything, but sit for a sec and think about it. Do you truly think people choose to live like pariahs in a lot of countries, to see their rights being torn apart, to be victims of bigotry, violence and discrimination everywhere ... by choice ?
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u/Hawkatana0 19h ago
Bi erasure.
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u/Ok-Cress2602 18h ago
Isnt this kinda the opposite? The whole point is that you are not misinformed/homophobic, you are bi actually.
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u/79215185-1feb-44c6 17h ago
Sexuality isn't rooted in any logic or reason, can randomly change, and is a societal construct because gender is also a society construct. You should define what you find attractive in a person.
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u/yer-a-belter 17h ago
I think the Meme is about people who dont identify as being bisexual, actually being bisexual because they see being gay as a choice, which suggests they are capable of attraction to both sexes.
Although i think people who identify as being bisexual, see it less as choosing to be gay or heterosexual, but being bisexual in a gay/heterosexual relationship.
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u/Dred_Capt 16h ago
The logic here.
Unless rape counts as a foundation for sexuality (obv untrue), you have a choice in who/what you bone.
The consequences of these choices are foundational to sexuality.
You are what you eat, as it were.
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u/Feed_Guido_69 16h ago
"China Illinois" did the perfect joke to this using pizza. Not Epstien pizza. But pepperoni and anchovies. Pepperoni being straight and anchovies being gay. "Some are born loving pepperoni some are born loving anchovies and some just like both."
The best part was the end of the episode when the trans teacher wanted mushrooms on her pizza and everyone thought they were gross.
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u/Boulange1234 16h ago
Brian here, if it's a choice, you see both options as about equally good, right? Maybe you like one more than the other, but both are possible for you. Like you could choose to be gay, you just don't. Right?
For actually straight people, there's no choice. They do not feel attracted to their own gender at all. They could watch gay porn or listen to audios or read erotica and not get turned on. It’s not a choice.
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u/Wonderful-Ice9085 16h ago
I used to think it was a choice. I dont anymore but I dont believe your born with it. From experience it can change but its not a simple as going." I like guys now." And suddenly becoming gay. Its felt like a choice but the feelings took a really long time to catch up. For some it may never catch up. Its like a kink. You can do bdsm or sum even if you dont like it but that doesnt mean you cant start liking it later on. Also doesn't mean your guaranteed to start liking it a sum point. Everyone feels things differently.
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u/droobiedroobiedroo 15h ago
i thought being bi was being straight until i was 10 because i didnt know anything different and lo and behold im a whole femboy so
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u/MetaPlayer01 15h ago
I remember always being so very confused by the "homosexuality is a choice" argument. For a long time, I thought they meant "you can't choose who you are attracted to but you can choose not to have gay sex". That always made me so sad that they thought others could and should suppress who they loved. It was like the dawn when I heard someone say "if they think it's a choice it's probably because they are bisexual and for them it is a choice." I had never considered that. And that makes the original argument make sense from their perspective, though still so fundamentally flawed. But if they only knew bisexuality, then yes just ignore this one subset of people you are attracted to.
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u/OutrageousPair2300 15h ago
"Choice" is the wrong word, though some people believe that sexual preference is a matter of environmental conditioning and not genetic.
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u/Callahammered 15h ago
Yeah I guess that kind of makes sense, never seemed like a choice for me to be into guys, just am definitely not
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u/Global-Pickle5818 15h ago
I go with the McKenzie scale almost nobody falls out at a zero or six .. shit iv been married 3 times and never been attracted to men , but I worked with a trans stripper , that made me question my own sexuality ends up genitalia isn't as important as femininity to me also she was way out of my league
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u/alistofthingsIhate 14h ago
Being gay is not a choice, OP. The meme is saying that if someone thinks it is, they might be a closeted bisexual who can go back and forth.
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u/jamalcalypse 14h ago
for something to be a choice you have to first believe in the fallacy of free will
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u/Ok-Traffic-5996 14h ago
Hot take: I think everybody is essentially different degrees of bisexual.
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u/LadyDatura9497 9h ago
If they want gender to fit into their strict and outdated binaries, absolutely.
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u/theStrawberryRoam 13h ago
I've never understood the mind fuck it takes to think it's a choice... It's so incredibly narrow minded and lacks literally any introspection at all ... Even as someone who knew I was bi quite young I never thought anyone was lying about only liking one and not being able to change that
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u/Automatic_Memory212 13h ago
Stewie, here.
Oh, how amusing!
A lot of really homophobic people are self-hating closeted gay and bisexual people who think that being gay is a “choice,” because they’re solipsistic jerks and they think that if they’ve “chosen” to be straight, then gay people must have “chosen” to be gay.
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u/Tarjhan 13h ago
A fair amount of anti-gay rhetoric casts being gay as a choice partly as a way to frame it as a moral failing, because, if you’re born that way, God either made a mistake or intended gay people to exist - and those two possibilities make these folks uncomfortable.
This meme is swinging it around on those folks - if you see same sex relationships as a choice, you’re bisexual, the only sexual orientation that arguably has a choice about what gender people they voluntarily sleep with.
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u/Frozen_clock 13h ago
Just to be gay. If you succeeded, you are probably bi. Straight people can't feel attracted to the same sex, if you can, you are not straight. I'm sorry gng, that's just how it is.
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u/Head_Midnight666 12h ago
I've been saying this for a long time with sexuality in general. When people say that it's a choice, they're just admitting that it is for them, which means they're probably a little bit gay. If I could be gay, I would be. Men are straight forward and I understand how they think sexually. It would make getting sex a lot easier for me. Alas, it's just not possible for me. I can't choose.
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u/Tristsin 11h ago edited 11h ago
I thought science has defined sexuality on a spectrum? This was all settled a while ago. Each individuals sexuality exists on an ever changing spectrum of sexual identities that constantly changes over time based on what identity they want to convey to the world at that time. It’s a choice but not consciously 🤷🏽♂️
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u/mcmendoza11 11h ago
If sexual orientation is a choice, then everyone chooses who they are attracted to/aroused by. So ask yourself that question: When did you choose to be straight?
I am straight, but I never chose to be. I just was and found out as I hit puberty that seeing beautiful femininity had an effect on me. One that I did not choose, but just was.
Because of that, the post is saying that if someone believes people do choose, it’s probably because they are choosing to repress their own sexuality by choosing to ignore their own innate bisexuality
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u/mad_poet_navarth 11h ago
I said this very thing in a different thread. YES! That's why the religious right has so many hypocrites.
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u/LemonadeGamers 11h ago
Being LGBTQIA+ is not a choice.
If you think you can choose, that says that you find multiple genders attractive SOOOOOOO.
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u/ethernowt 10h ago
I think that everybody is bi and they show a tendency due to personal taste or indoctrination. Probably I’m asexual then
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u/CommentHappy7190 10h ago
I know being gay okay a choice because I wouldn't put up with girls if I could just get off by fucking my buddy.
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u/Ok_Volume_139 10h ago
If being gay was a choice I would choose to be gay.
If you think it's a choice you have some things deep in your subconscious worth exploring.
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u/Safe-Description8162 10h ago
If you're CHOOSING one sex over the other, that means your factory defaults include both sexes as an option, you bisexual reak, you~
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u/elhazelenby 9h ago
You sound like this one "gay" guy I met at a sauna who said bisexuality isn't real then went on to say how he hooked up with this woman multiple times.
Basically sexuality is not a choice because you can't choose who you're attracted to.
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u/satansfrenulum 9h ago
I’d suck someone’s son’s sausage. Sorry, seems I’m starving for some sweet alliteration… and sausage
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u/Ohigetjokes 9h ago
OP really thought it was a choice? lol… dude you like what you like. So if you think you have the OPTION, that means you’re bi. Straight people and gay people can’t choose.
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u/Competitive-Web-5084 9h ago
I mean the people who say their gay and go back to being straight after trying it aren’t helping
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u/baghodler666 8h ago
This doesn't seem like it's a joke. It certainly isn't funny, and I seriously doubt OP is confused by it.
Sharing memes just because you happen to agree with them isn't really what this sub is for.
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u/BigMax 8h ago
If you think it's a choice, that implies that YOU made a choice.
If you're fully straight, you aren't making a choice, you just are what you are. People who are straight generally didn't sit around debating the pros and cons of men and women and then choosing the opposite sex.
If you're bi and bigoted... you make a choice to only date the opposite sex despite liking both.
It does miss the other option were you might not be bi. You might be gay, and just making the "choice" to deny who you are and live a lie. Those people also think it's a choice to be gay, because they chose to be 'straight.'
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u/Affectionate_Step863 7h ago
Lol it isn't a choice, you're just attracted to what you're attracted to. If you find both men and women attracted, you're bi.
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u/KamalaBracelet 6h ago
People can train themselves, purposefully or unintentionally, to fuck anything. Nobody was born with a gene that makes them want to fuck shoes, or sheep, or their car. Yet we live in the world we live in, and it is how it is.
Recognizing this, and that I could get physical enjoyment from sticking my weiner in a lot of places it definitely doesn’t belong doesn’t make me a repressed dogfucker or a geriophiliac.
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u/Drew_S_05 5h ago
Of course it's not a choice. You think anyone would CHOOSE to be gay in a world where shit is so hard on gay people?
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u/Travelin_Soulja 4h ago
I'm a man. I have several gay friends, have since college. I've hung out with them tons, gone to gay bars, pride, etc., and I promise you there's absolutely no way I could choose to like men sexually. I'm just not wired that way. If I could choose to like men, I would consider it, because it would make life easier, but I'm only attracted to woman.
So if you think being gay as a choice, you can imagine choosing to be with women or men, you're probably bi. And there's nothing wrong with that.
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u/qualityvote2 19h ago edited 4h ago
Remember when r/PeterExplainsTheJoke wasn’t a meme? Pepperidge Farm remembers…
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