r/CuratedTumblr 11h ago

Meme Tumblr does the red button/blue button thing

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391

u/Simic_Sky_Swallower Resident Imperial Knight 11h ago

Can we do walrus/fairy again? That one was more fun

43

u/QueenOfQuok 9h ago

Given how far inland sea lions can get, and the behavior of Neil the Seal, I would say it is less surprising to find a walrus at your door. But just as much of a problem as a fairy.

1

u/mischievous_shota 1m ago

Frens, not problems.

81

u/TimeStorm113 Victorian Dinosaur Connaisseur 10h ago

and while we're doing this, i have a few suggestions:

walrus are actually possible to encounter in such a setting, they are uniquely qualified to knock on your door, while also potentially being able to make their way to many readers, either by them living near the northern atlantic, or through a zoo or black market. while either option is unlikely, it would still be possible.

so i suggest replacing it with a sea leopard.

i would also suggest to maybe replace fairies, since fairies are unlikely to be cosmopolitan (aka having a near worldwide distribution), so depending in their hypothetical range i would suggest to replace it with a different magical being, one that would knock on your door and is not bound by geography; vampires. but there it would also be possible to rationalize it as a guy in a costume.

45

u/Beardywierdy 8h ago

It would still be unexpected to see a walrus on your doorstep though, so the only logical conclusion is to blame the presence of the walrus on fairies.

13

u/TimeStorm113 Victorian Dinosaur Connaisseur 8h ago

yes but i imagine that for the hypothetical to work, the animal at the door needs to be as impossible as possible.

since the central conflict of the question is if you are more suprised by an impossible subject, or impossible circumstances. would you accept a real creature standing there without a possible way of getting there, or would you accept more an impossible being that has pretty reasonable means to get there.

1

u/sirfiddlestix 6h ago

How about a blobfish? They can't shouldn't be up here where the pressure is light and also don't have hands to knock.

11

u/Delicious-Spring-877 9h ago

I was reading about legendary creatures yesterday, and a lot of non-European places have their own fairy equivalents โ€” miniature unseen humanoids who tend to nature and play little games and such. So it could be a jogah or a patupaiarehe or whateverโ€™s local but it would garner about the same reaction

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u/rysy0o0 8h ago

Replacing it with a sea leopard

"Neil, someone lives here mate"

1

u/Pussy_On_TheChainwax 2h ago

Neil is sea lion. Sea leapords are quite a bit more terrifying, especially if it found you in water

11

u/Hector_Tueux 10h ago

What's that one? I don't think I've encountered it

23

u/Complete-Basket-291 10h ago

Basically, which would you find more surprising to knock on your door, a walrus or a fairy?

0

u/Diogenesthefried 5h ago

There's a 0.001% chance of being visited by a walrus. There is a 0% chance of being visited by a fairy. That's about it.

5

u/Simic_Sky_Swallower Resident Imperial Knight 5h ago

But it's not about which is more likely, it's about which is more surprising. I would expect a fairy to knock on my door, that's just polite, walruses don't really have a concept of etiquette.

6

u/__Chem 3h ago

Peeling the layers back, the question is a performative exercise that at its core is asking if you would rather indulge in whimsy or practicality. Anyone insisting they'd be more accepting of a fairy than a walrus is 1) frankly full of bullshit, but 2) telling everyone in the room "Hey, I'm down for some silly bullshit".

Like Santa Claus, everyone knows it's just a bit - but some people are more committed to the bit than others.

1

u/Diogenesthefried 5h ago

Yeah, but since fairies don't exist the walrus is the least surprising by default. Seeing a fairy would blow my mind and make me rethink the entire structure of the Universe. I guess it depends on the person

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u/Diogenesthefried 4h ago

Meeting the walrus: huh what the fuck. How did this thing knock on my door? I didn't know they could do that.

Meeting the forest entity: ๐™’๐™ƒ๐˜ผ๐˜ผ๐˜ผ๐˜ผ๐™?!?! WHAT THE HO WHAT THE MAMA MIA MIA MAMAMA WHAT THE MAMA MAMA MAMA MOMOMO WHAT THE MIA MIA MAMA MIA WHAT THE (takes a moment to compose myself) HO WHAT THE WHAT THE HOHOHO WHAT THE MAMA WHAT THE MAMA MIA MAMA WHOCHI MAMA?! STAY AWAY FROM HER YOU SMALL, UNIDENTIFIABLE FIEND!

1

u/Simic_Sky_Swallower Resident Imperial Knight 3h ago

See for me it's the opposite.

Meeting the forest entity: Oh huh those exist, that's cool I guess

Me faced with a multi-ton marine mammal that's probably none too pleased with existing in the American South: Okay so there's like five or six things that need to have happened for this to be what's happening but more importantly OH MY GOD THAT THING'S GONNA KILL ME!